mornings

shaking 

ever so slightly 

it's four a.m.

and cold outside 

so rise

slowly

as though dipping your toe

in the pool

as from the blanket

the warm blue robe trails

leaving 

a cocoon 

of warmth

for you

mornings are difficult

dry mouth

cracking lips

red eyes

running on a lack of sleep

and i would prefer

if i did not have to wake

and deal

with everyday life

shaking fingers

assemble an outfit

wishing

for the comfort

of warmth

drowsy

sunshine

and the scent

of baby powder

and freshly washed sheets

flip over my long tangled hair

and hook the bra

search for a pair of warm pants

a uniform shirt

check if i have everything i need

walk out

my sanctuary 

breakfast sizzles

in the kitchen

as plates clank

so i partake

of the feast laid out before me

although

i am not yet hungry

survival instincts 

i suppose

somehow

i have kept moving

my will

has not yet weakened

to the point of death

yet i still

would rather

be asleep

forever

yet another day has begun

why