The Civil War Diary

September 19, 2042

Day 1,

I remember in my history class when back in the 1800's, we had a Civil War over slavery. Now, we have a Civil War over I don't even know. I'm 16 years old in my orphanage. Been here since I was 12. Parents died in a car crash. I was still basically an orphan then I guess. They were drug addicts. Herzog. A drug that will make you addicted if you do it once. Mix of heroin, opium, and ecstasy. Crazy high apparently.

Anyway, the name is Don. If you have this journal or diary or whatever the fuck it is, it means I'm either captured or dead. You'll have to stick around to see which one.

Here is the background. Shit got fucked and now they have taken current technology and put it all toward military. Literally, it's 2042 now, people estimate that the military has technology that would lead them into 2056. The public all over the states has the technology of fucking stoves and shit. Phones, tv, all that is gone except for radio. Fuck.

The orphanage is filled with about maybe 15 kids now. Us kids that weren't here when the shells hit...we made it. The rest didn't. My best friend died that day. I never cried though. We cleaned out the stuff and I found a lot of blank books. This isn't actually Day 1 for me...it's Day 1 for you. I'm going to be brief over the events that happened up to this point.

Basically the US decided to have another Civil War, called Civil War II. They drafted as young as 16 for boys and 18 for girls. To currently am living on the southeast side of the US. This war is between the East Coast and West Coast. I can't remember what they are fighting over. I'm too busy trying to fight to live. We have traders that come around towns and trade stuff like medicine, food, all that stuff for other stuff. I secretly stole a gun from a trader. I'm a pick pocket.

I remember when I first came to the orphanage and no one liked me. I found a deck of cards and started doing magic tricks. It was fun for all of us. The kids had some entertainment and stuff. But those days are gone now. We all grew up and developed. That's basically the story for how I got here. Now I guess I'm going to take you through today.

I woke up this morning. Since the shelling, we had to sleep on the floor with blankets. I checked under my pillow to make sure my gun was safe. It was. I got up early all of the time. So I had to wait for out foster mother to come in and actually get everyone up. We all went down to the kitchen where there were bowls of oatmeal out for us. Kids complained. The foster mother explained it as "This is what we're going to have for a long time because of this war. If you have a problem with it, we will throw you out and save our food." The kid shut up and ate the oatmeal. I had no problem with it. I love oatmeal. After breakfast, we all had to clean the shelling damage. We were partnered up. I was partnered with this girl named Allie. She didn't like me for some reason, when she came over to me, I stopped her.

"Don't worry about it. I'll take care of it." I told her. Before she could say anything else, I left and I started cleaning. That's where I found the black books. I took them and held on to them. At around 11, the trader came about. Our foster mom traded her old jewelry and two first aid kits for a lot of food. We didn't need to worry about the first aid kits. We had a lot since we were an orphanage. Oh foster father worked at the hospital. He was keeping guard there. Thieves were breaking into places and taking stuff. I couldn't blame them. They need stuff too.

After the trader left, we were to keep cleaning. I finished a two person job by myself before everyone else was done. I sat in one of the chairs I cleaned. I looked at everyone else. They were complaining and cleaning. The foster mother came over to me.

"You done, Don?"

"Yeah."

"Nice. You can go back to your room. You'll get extra food for being done first."

"No. I can't. We don't have that luxury anymore. Everyone needs as much food as they can have. I can't take extra."

"Alright. I get it. But you can go back."

"Alright, thanks."

I went back in and Allie followed because she was my "partner". I went in and I put the blank books beside my pallet. Allie looked at me the whole time.

"You need something, Allie?"

"How are you so cold hearted?"

"What do you mean?"

"Your best friend died three days ago, and you're just...doing stuff like it never happened?"

"What does it matter to you? You fucked around and broke his heart. Don't act like you have feelings for him now. You guys were together before I came here. When I got here and he actually found a friend, you hated us both for it. I still don't know what I did, but I know what you did to him. Don't act like you care."

"I do."

"Get out of here. You don't get to judge me and hate me, but I can't stop you from it. Never have been able to, never will be able to."

"Donny--"

"No. I don't want to hear it."

"How could you not cry, get mad, something. Everyone cried except for the person who meant the most to him and vice versa."

"Allie, if you must know, it's because men don't cry. He's gone. I can't cry him back to life. And I damn sure don't need you in here trying to tell me what's what. You fucked yalls relationship up."

"You partook in the situ--"

"There was a reason we were still friends afterward Allie. Because you partook. I was raped."

"Rape doesn't exist for men."

"Get out of here. God, I knew you were a bitch, but not a fucking retard. Rape exist for men. What you did to me, was rape. Believe it or not, I was actually fucked up about it. It might not seem like a big deal to you, but if I did it to you, you'd understand."

Allie stayed silent. She knew I was right. My best friend, Porter, used to date Allie before I came around. When I came around, me and Porter hit it off. We hung out and stuff. He showed a bit less attention to Allie. So what she did to try and keep us apart was that she was going to rape me and say I had sex with her. Keep in mind, at this point in time, were 13. Well, she slipped me drugs and I was out like a light. She kidnapped me from me and Porter's room and took me outside. Little did she know, Porter was dehydrated that particular night and needed water. He went to get up and to see if I wanted anything, and I was gone. He looked around and then out of the corner of his eye, he saw us out of a window. She was on top of me. Riding me. He was about to come kill me, but when he went outside, he heard her talking and moaning while she was riding me. She said something along the lines of,

"Porter will definitely drop you now after I'm done with you. God, ruffies work like a charm on men."

Something like that. He threw her off of me and looked at me. I was passed out. He dressed me properly and took me back inside. Porter was mad with life. He was crying. He never slept that night. He waited for me to wake up and told me what happened. I was shook. I didn't leave my bed for 2 days. Allie never got in trouble. Me and Porter were closer.

The day Porter died, three days ago, was that he was here when the shelling happened. I was out looking for stuff. Allie was out too. Different group. Porter was doing chores in the house. I heard it. Everyone else ran back. I walked. I saw it all. I saw Porter's body. Allie cried on him. I pushed her off of him and I took Porter to the back playing area. I stole a shovel and I dug him a grave and buried him. I left the shovel there and I went to bed.

That was three days ago. Allie was in here now wondering why I never cried. After I told her off, I thought she left. She didn't. She came up and hugged me from behind.

"I'm so sorry Donny. I was jealous and, and I was just a mess."

"Get away from me Allie. You aren't welcomed here."

"Okay."

She let me go and walked away crying. Someone was standing there. They came up behind me and hugged me.

"Allie, let me go."

"I'm not Allie, Donny."

It was Kaitlyn. A girl I knew. We were somewhat friends. We talked to each other. Hung out sometimes.

"Kaitlyn? What are you doing here?"

"I came to look for you. Then I heard you yelling at Allie and...I'm so sorry about what she did to you."

"It's whatever."

"No it's not, Donny. Men or woman, nothing like that should happen to anyone."

"Look, it's fine. I still consider myself a virgin because I didn't remember it. So it's good."

"How can you make things seem less of a problem than they are?"

"I don't know."

"We're friends, right?"

"Of course. You're my only friend. But right now, I need to think and be by myself. Not to be blunt but, can you leave?"

"Yeah."

She let me go and I sat on the ground. She was about to walk away, but she leaned down and kissed my cheek. I looked at her. She smiled and waved. I felt my cheek. I felt something inside of me chest. I didn't know what it was, but it was impossible to ignore. I preoccupied myself with reading.

The day went along boring. The kids came into the room. Kaitlyn sat diagonal to me and she kept giving me glances. We had our dinner and after that, we went to our beds. I lied down and looked at the ceiling. I couldn't sleep. I looked next to me. I grabbed one of the books and found a pen and I turned the first page. I wrote

September 19, 2042

Day 1,

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