Yours Truly

Dear Sirs or Madam,

Allow me to introduce myself, I am Mr Johnson.  I come fully qualified and with bonafides as this letter in the box with the "package."  

The "package" is a technical review of my skills, notice the neck is cleanly cut, and exsanguinated.  This is just a sample of my work.  Oh, there may be some resemblance to your English Literature professor who gave you the failing marks from 25 years ago.  She wasn't that hard to track down, Professor Hodge, I believe...

As you can clearly see, I am a man of means, and a man of ability. An ability to get things done.

In closing, I am more than qualified for any task that you need performed and also enclose is your home's GPS coordinates, La 40.7127837 Lo -74.00594130000002

I shall use them to bring a bottle of Shiraz to discuss the assignment.

Yours Truly,

Mr Johnson