Harder, harder, now was that so hard?

How much must you love someone in order to treat them as you don't ?

I don't mean genuinly mistreat them. I mean, how much must you love someone to treat them as nothing more than ash and dog shit on your shoe by request? Maybe it's more of a "how much do they trust me?" ,or "how much do they love me?' thing. Who knows. Perhaps, we all feel as though we deserve mistreatment? Reprimand? Likewise, with our subconciounse always putting our emotion first, maybe we perfer to recieve the punishment we sentence to ourselves by someone who we know doesn't think we are bad at all? With every slap, we get to remind ourselves that in a moments time, we're cleansed. Cleansed without losing a companion. Cleansed withought a hospital visit. Cleansed without someone loosing faith in you. We as humans love to be punished by someone we trust, in order not to lose the trust of someone we love. It's quite selfish when you dive in. "My dignity is more important than anything I did to you."

When we scream harder, we are just so turned on by the idea of dishing out our own controlled revenge. When we scream don't stop, that's the guilt of selfishness creeping in. Good luck escaping the cycle. Once you start controlling your conciouse, there's no turning back.