″ HAPPINESS ”
it feels like death follows her every move
wind against skin, lost in the dark of midnight, the wind that makes the smell of the death feel like home.
a serene ambience where sound is muffled out. the movement of water in the harbour
as she stands on the hill onlooking like some kind of higher power.
we’re alive
we’re alive
sat wondering why we’re here
lovely dreams of escaping to foreign land and spending the rest of her days in a small village off the coast.
far, far away from everything and everyone.
we’re alone
we’re alone
yet we are brought back
cutting her body in familiar ways
in ways the remind her of freedom or perhaps control
we’re hurt
we’re hurt
troubled children we have no right to want to die
lives perfect and laid out in straight and neat ways because this is happiness
when formalities are obeyed because in their eyes she can't possibly love her?
or we can be lost and found at once and be left fucking dead in the arms of past lovers
we’re dying
we’re dying
young children they don’t understand the consequences of their actions
and did they stand there alone wishing for the wind once more
because they're capable of a future in which the wind isn’t needed. we have money and security.
we're safe
we're safe
did you pray at night
for a returned soul without a receipt?
because we can’t escape now
this is our fate
we’re happy
we’re happy
and yet we’re still left wondering if life is a curse or a blessing.
we're a curse
we're a blessing