Super Salad Woman (And Other Such Powers)

I am very hesitant to share this with anyone for fear they won’t believe me, or that they might sell me out to scientists who will lock me up. They’ll disect me piece by piece after forcing me to use my powers for evil. But I can’t hide in the dark anymore. So here it goes...

I can eat salads without veggies getting stuck in my teeth. That’s not luck, my friends.

I went on a date with a blind man and when I got out of my car to greet him, he ran away screaming. I must have restored his sight.

Then there was the time I was walking my dog, and I just got this feeling that he was going to stop and use the bathroom. And lo and behold, he did!

You probably don’t believe any of this, or think I’m insane. I would expect no less, really.

That’s okay. I am not afraid to be the unsung hero.