Ramblings of a High School Senior
Senioritis is literally the worse condition of them all. I mean what other disease can make an individual stop caring so much about their entire life despite knowing the importance of certain tasks?
I mean, don’t even get me started on how many assignments I have missing in the gradebook right now. Should I be worried about them? ABSOLUTELY. Even getting one math problem might move my gpa to tears.
Oh my poor, poor gpa. Once a shining 4.0 is now facing true demise in the social realm of nerds. (*gasp* Oh no! A 3.5?? Whatever shall she do??)
Like who knows what miracle is required to get me to pass Stats class even if I did try to make an effort at this time. Of course the better alternative is to just sit in my room and stare at the ceiling and complain how terrible high school is and lament the fact that I still have to go there for the next two months despite having been accepted to various institutions since basically December and committed to a university for almost three months now.
In all honesty, it’s pathetic. The fact that I must sit and suffer through a mythology class of busy work and sit unflinching through another stats course in which I basically don’t understand a word is sad. My high school refuses to let students have free periods. Not even seniors. Which if you think about it is absolute crap. I’ve had enough credits to graduate since my sophmore year. It’s not even like I would’ve failed out of school too because ya gurl had straight A’s and a plethora of AP classes.
Trust me, I have sucked the bone marrow out of the education I could have. And in all honesty, I’m exhausted. I’m tired of adults pointing fingers at me and telling me that I have so much more potential. Like even they know that their words are flimsy because I’m not going to get removed from my university now. Especially not when a surpass their average student by lightyears. I do not mean to brag, I simply mean to tell you of a wonderous mind that once resided in my head that managed to get me this far.
It’s not even like this mind has abandoned me. Instead, it rests in my skull day after day and achieves ultimate boredom. It cries to be used for something other than useless arithmetic.
But I will be honest, there are benefits to senioritis. Because I could not care enough about school at this point in my life, I’ve decided that it would be better to just find new passions. Now, I’m already a student of many interests from dance and violin to Model UN and HOSA. But I decided to try something entirely different.
I made a youtube channel. That’s right-- this nerd is a youtuber now. And an instagrammer. I’ve started my first business without having to invest any money (though I project it will be two years before I can make any profit from it).
All this wouldn’t exist without senioritis pushing me to look away from academics. And in fact, after years of thinking I would definitely pursue an academic career whether it be in law or medicine or engineering, I finally came to the conclusion that this like just ain’t it for this gal.
Yes, I dreamed for so long to publish my own novel. And maybe someday I’ll return to that dream. But for now I write for myself, even if it seems like gibberish or disjointed thoughts. I’m putting the lid on this box and putting it on the shelf.
It’s time to explore the world and achieve my non-academic dreams. I’m still going to university in the fall and will be surely dedicated to my collegiate studies more than my current highschool courses but I now know that despite everybody says, I’m not a scholar.
And honestly, maybe at my core, I never was. Maybe I’m not supposed to your stereotypical story of a highschool nerd rising to be the jock’s boss. Nah fam.
I’m gonna own an empire that the nerdiest nerds will beg to be a part of.
I believe in me. And you know what? Maybe I can’t stay on topic and ramble on and somehow take the conversation from senioritis to my future goals but whatever. I’m only 18. I don’t need to know my entire life now. I just need to make sure I’m choosing a good path.