“Sincerely”
Dear Jennifer,
I don’t really know how to say this: with everything that you had going on in life; but I just want to say sorry. Those words aren’t enough to apologize for everything that I’ve done, or didn’t do. To put it simply: I’ve let you down. Ever since the age of nine, I never gave you the courage to speak up about what your eldest brother has been doing to you. I did however, let the school counselor know about the abuse you have been through, the bruises visible on your arms or legs.
When you went into foster care, I should’ve gave you the support you desperately needed in order to combat the loss of one family and the sudden appearance of another. It’s really a shame that our parent’s never believed us, but believed my eldest brother and his lies...
Once you were in that new home, I should’ve gave you the strength to withstand the painful moments when you had weekly visits with your parents. I knew it hurt, considering you’d break down in the middle of your third-grade class. Mrs. Heller was such a kind woman, comforting you when I didn’t.
During those teenage years, I should’ve gave you freewill and the ability to stand up to others—not pressured or coerced into doing things you shouldn’t have to put up with. We should’ve told your adopted sister ‘no’ to many things: stealing dad’s car, driving you illegally to a friend’s house to do drugs, flashing a complete stranger on the internet, letting weird men into our house while our parents were gone...so many things that were wrong, but few that we went against our sister’s say-so.
If there’s one thing I’d never forgiven myself for: it’s for not letting us love whoever we wanted, without other’s influencing our decision. Sure, we lucked-out, dating a wonderful guy for twelve years now, but we did break-up with him twice because our sister didn’t like him, or because of our best friend (who, at the time unbeknownst to us, was going through some issues of her own).
I should’ve done a lot of things for you back then, but I was immature and unexperienced. For everything, I’m sorry and I know that we will do better in our present and our future.
Sincerely,
Jennifer