I am not okay
unless I am in pain
I feel better when I’m losing
than I do when I gain.
when others have worse lives than me
I feel sick inside
until I can self-sabotage in some way
I feel like crap, and I don’t know why.
I’m happy when I’m sick
maybe I have a terrible disease?
as stressing all the time weakens my body
I grow more and more pleased!
when I write I feel like I am making something I care about
not just sitting around, full of self-pity
even though I'll never stop hurting myself
when I die I hope people can enjoy my poetry.
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