Mr. Clean
children dream of superheros the ones with fire ringing from their hands, the ones that lift cars over their heads. the ones with the really good hair; okay maybe that’s just who i envision when i think of a superhero. Maybe that’s because i’m losing my hair at a fast rate. i wonder if there’s a superhero with that superpower. Jeez, what would his name be hairanator or something. there i go again going off subject. the fact is i’m here to talk about me; my superpower. so my dad was one of those lift the car over your head superheros. yep, that means i come from a long line of pretty stellar guys. my younger brother is like that and my older brother has those type of powers. maybe it was my curse to be born the middle child. some people say that i’m the forgotten child and even though my mom used to try to comfort me when i was a kid, by saying that, that wasn’t true. deep down inside every time she looked at me i knew she wondered what went wrong. if she didn’t then something was wrong with her. well that was a long time ago, at least my youth. and now a thirty two i’m balding and trying to embrace my superpower that my mom so thoughtfully called Mr. clean. it all started when i was a kid i could change my own diaper, clean my own room, heck i think i came out of the womb with wipe in hand. “well sir what does can Mr. Clean do?” Ah! i’m glad you asked. my hands are practically wipe dispensters, i can pull brooms and mops from behind my ears, and i can even become a vacummn. my saliva is fresh clean water, and if i gargle then i make soap. it works really quite very well. my home is always clean. every where i step becomes spotless. it’s not the type of power you have to hide, i mean it’s not like i need a cape or anything, it’s not like i can only clean at night. and i mean that has it’s benefits. i see my brothers they had to hide the fact from their friends, and wives that at night they leave and pick up trains and planes, etc. their kind of typical clark kent, you know what i mean the glasses and geek working a tech job by day; and being a hero and fighting batman by night. i can be normal, have normal relationships most of my friends love the fact that i’m the best houseguest they could have because i equal a maid too