The Chaos

Been trying to make sense of the chaos

Realized I’ve written it all in crayons

Weed loud so I drown out the sounds

Of the voices with contention; doubt

Lit the bridge that burned down this house

Sorry if the flame I can’t contain

Is a problem or a stain

Don’t mean to be a strain

Just wanna turn to a new day

Not let hate ink the page

Call this chapter ‘I’ll be brave’

If I fall I won’t stay here

Save at the bottom, I hear speakers

Playing joyful music so I shuffle feet first

Over glass or flaming rocks

I got your back; I’m at your front

Armed to the teeth, holding blunts

If I knocked on your door

Would you open up?

Keep in mind my glass

Has never been a cup

I’d walk a line but I see mud

I fall to fly my graceful strut

Straight to hell, paved up fucks

I use to give

Now they live here on my heart

My armor all, code or crutch

I say I don’t believe in luck

But I flip pennies heads up for the stars

To sprinkle wishes on for those that come along

I thought that things would feel more permanent

Thought joy could come by earning it

Lost hope one summer burning it

They say go straight I’m turning it

Turning up my music and my cup

Someone roll me up another blunt

These storms will blow in ghost to haunt

All your skeletons will dance to shore

It’s ok, been there before

Accept that some things have no cure

Don’t get lost in the rituals

Or let it take all your spiritual

Tomorrow’s a myth

Today the gift

My anxiety’s the rift

Chasm between my heart and lips

Failure in the normal system

Lost my best men; my sailing ships

Should find my feet, gotta get a grip

I’ve been dying learning how to live

Guess the chaos isn’t really making sense