from the place before a judge

from the place before a judge,

i watch you with budding sorrow.

as you discover blood,

and tainted truth.

i watch as you search for the note i never left,

and i find myself wanted to tell you why.

it wasn't your fault,

please don't think it ever was.

i wait for judgment,

and know i'm going to hell.

death took me with warm arms,

saying child you've come home.

judge hates me i think,

for taking myself home.

i wish for paper,

and a pen too.

here's the words i would have said,

if I hadn't been wrong.

"You were my first,

You were my last.

You are the one,

You caught me fast.

it isn't your fault,

so stop looking for something wrong with you.

all that's ever wrong,

was me."

maybe if I would have left,

the smallest word,

You wouldn't be here with me.