I’m Ready

My skull is a cage

With a broken lock.

The key fits-

But the door isn't opening.

Pressure's building up

Up

Up

I'm ready to explode

In a fury of

"What if's" and "could have's"

I'm tired of fighting

I'm tired of falling

Giving up has never sounded so blissfully sweet

Yeah, I'm putting one foot in front of the other

But what is that worth when the enveloping mass of black is nipping at my heels

Threatening to swallow me whole

A fistful of pills

A hand gun

A razor blade

Has never looked so inviting

There's not much fight left

And it's a lost cause I've given up on

It's not a matter of "if" anymore

It's a matter of "how long" and "how soon"

Please hurry

So I can be over with

Obliterated to nothing

How long until I can return my life energy to something that actually matters?

I don't matter.

This doesn't matter.

I'm done.

I'm lost.

I'm over with.

Finish me, please.

Please.

Please.

I'm ready.

Take me now

I'm waiting for the code word

Signaling when it's time to end

I'm tired of fighting this fight that's never ending

Endless

Infinite

Paradox

I'm done with hurting and I'm done with hurting others just take me now so I can give up. I'm ready, I promise.

I'm ready.