What If I Had Been Better?

What if I was truly good,

innocent and untampered?

What if I had worked hard forever,

instead of being slightly pampered?

What if I had been kinder, wiser?

What if I had been the freind you needed?

What if I had been considerate?

What if I had gave instead of pleaded?

What if I had been agreeable?

What if I had felt my remorse sooner?

I have always wanted to be a good person-

but I ended up a swooner.

Oh, what if I had apoligised?

What if I had come out clean,

instead of lying?

Oh, why was I so mean?

What if I stop worrying now-

what if I move forwards now?

What If I do better, now?

But my only question is... how?