Holding on - remix

I had never held anyone like this before. I couldn't find it in myself to let go. I could hardly hear him over my hard breathing, but I was too busy sobbing to even respond. I could feel the life in him slipping away as I wondered where all the time between us had gone.

He came home drunk so I put the girls to bed and turned the radio on in their room up loud so they would sleep through the commotion. I climbed on top of him and he rose and moaned a little. Even drunk and passed out and drooling he still wanted me. And I gave him all of me.

I held him tight, my hands on his throat. I had never held anyone like this before. Gripping so firmly, my knuckles whitening on his purple throat. He flailed already losing too much oxygen, too drunk to communicate with his limbs and hold me off. The weight of my pregnancy overpowered him. I felt my third little girl working with me to put an end to his life before she started hers.

I couldn't take it any longer. I couldn't raise my girls in A home with this man. This was the last time he would ever call me a bitch, slap me in front of my children, or spit in the food I had worked so hard to make. I had bruises. I'd just claim self defense.

"Wha- how did- uhh..." Too confused now to put a thought together. Stirring from my dream I looked at my husband sleeping peacefully next to me. The images disturbed me.

Is that really what I wanted?

Thank you to southern_sweet, queen-of-scots, Lynn and melanierose. Great stories with awesome lines!!