Everything Hurts

Everything hurts.

I'm not sure why.

I want to tell my parents but they have been so busy work 4 different jobs to support us. With Dad drinking every night, Mom worries for us kids.

I want to tell my siblings, but my sister is working hard to get into college. My baby brother has his own problems with the kids at his school. He wouldn't understand anyway.

Everything hurts.

Especially my lungs.

I want to tell my teachers but they have so much to do and so little pay. And they probably can't do anything about it, even if they believed me.

I don't know who to tell. So I tell my dog, not that he can do much other than cuddle me while I cry to sleep.

Everything hurts.

But I have to be brave for everyone.

I'm scared but I can manage. My lungs hurt worse now and the pressure is building. I pass out at least once a day, but no one notices with their busy lives. It's ok. I will learn to deal.

Everything hurts.

Being brave is hard.

Breathing is hard.

My teachers are mad for my low grades. My parents too. Both of my siblings glare at me. I wish they knew. But I have to be brave.

Everything hurts.

Everything hurts.

Everything hurts.

Nothing hurts anymore. I guess its hard to feel when you no longer exist. This is what my bravery got me.