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Heartbreaking poetry- make me cry
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broken
Chapter 42 of 46
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deathetix

leave

tables scratched with names

smudged ink of fantasies and strangers

secrets that faded out with time

and hides in the depths of our memory

a thousand stories that never got to happen

i wonder if you’ll find yours

scratched in with fingernails

hidden in between the rows of desks

scratched hard and deep

on the table i used to sit at

the chairs were dented, and the

light tan was repainted a darker brown

i could still see the places

with streaks and scrapes and gashes

they smelled of oak and heavy promises

leather-bound books and quiet heartbreaks

the way the seats were arranged

remains untouched, nostalgic

and i’ll never forget the day

when yours became an empty space

the dark green chalkboard, used to be filled with words

that we tried to decipher, the summer of 2020

i could almost hear the sound of chalk against wood

that once replaced the rhythm of the clock

which now hangs on the wall, stayed in the date of 2017

what used to be covered in chalk now sits clean and empty

but stained with our ghastly white fingerprints

do you remember? that night, raining red chalk

something changed, and i know you like to pretend

it never happened, but i still dream about it every night

windows were opened and the silent wind

tasted like peaches and cotton candy

dark chocolate and a field of wild flowers

your favorite tastes and your favorite perfume

we used to stare out the window

our gazes meeting in the far horizon

pastel sunsets, lifeless trees, worn-out buildings

wishing time would go by faster

i looked through the windows one last time

the outside world continued to stay the same

so what changed? tell me it’s my fault

i sat down in the seat

that belonged to someone i

promised i tried to forget

but how could i, when you

gave me so much to remember?

so many reasons to live?

years later

the same classroom

the same stories

the same fucking lies

i sat in your seat

& cried and cried

for what seemed like the first time

ever since you left

and i never knew how to cope

when it didn’t feel anything like falling

but holding a gun against my head

and hoping you wouldn’t pull the trigger

so i guess time has decided to stop

in this one place: room 815

all i ever wanted was to sit across from you again

even if you never knew

but that one night was too long

and a lifetime will never be enough

in your seat

i finally saw

for once

what you were seeing for years

and i think i understand now

why you had to leave

- deathetix

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