"I will set your house on fire."

"No you won't."

"Don't try me. You know I won't back down from a challenge."

"I'm not trying you. I'm just saying that you might think you will set my house on fire, but you're not going to in the end."

"Yes I am. I've always wanted to burn someone's house down."

"And sure, we can do that. Just at another time, and at someone's house who isn't my own."

"What about your parents' house?"

"What about your house?"

"No! I like that place. That's the reason I chose it."

"And my parents will kill you if you burn down their house."

"No they won't. You're their favourite child, and you like me."

"No I don't."

"Fine, but at least you'd defend me from them, right?"

"Of course not. I still want to be left in their will - and I'm not letting my brother get all the money from their mercenary business, or leaving him in charge of it. He'd just destroy the whole thing and probably run to the police. Narc."

"Okay, but still-"

"Also, where do you think I learnt my abilites from?"

"You were self-taught?"

"No."

"Anyway, can I set your house on fire?"

"If you really want someone else's house to burn down, you can choose numbr 51. They have a hot tub."

"What do you have against people with hot tubs?"

"Hot tubs. Or you could do number 57, they still refuse to accept that people are allowed to be gay."

"Nah, you're punishment enough for them."

"I'm not that bad."

"Hello Mr I-have-a-pride-flag-on-the-front-door-and-rainbows-are-everywhere."

"Rainbows are cool. They're fragments of light that-"

"Yeah, I don't care. Fire is cooler."

"You're wrong, but that still doesn't mean you can burn my house down."

"I'll buy you a new one?"

"You'll buy me a new house?"

"Yeah sure, they only cost a few hundred thousand pounds these days."

"This one cost 600,000, and I'm not having anything cheaper than that."

"It's still under a million, and that's basically nothing right?"

"To your parents, maybe."

"Thank you for bringing up that example. My parents let me burn down our house so many times when I was a kid."

"Did they ever tell you that insurance fraud is a crime?"

"I'm pretty sure that with giving a child materials and teaching them how to make a fire look like it was started by accident, insurance fraud was the least of their worries."

"Your parents were crazy - you're crazy. You are not burning down my house."

"It's a bit rich you calling people crazy, you're literally a serial killer."

"Yeah, so are you. And?"

She rolled her eyes. "Nevermind. It was just an idea."

"We'll burn down the abandoned factory instead, how about that?"

She grinned. "You're the best."