Dull Bones
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i am reduced to dull bones
and swallowed i-adore-you’s
and something like mildly waking up
in the middle of another bookmarked
“dark and stormy night”
and staying that way, a flavour of
staying-up insomnia that’s only ever so
vaguely disinterested in keeping me untroubled
and undefined—staying up up and away
past my anachronistic bedtime
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there’s an itch within my dull bones
in places i’m frustratingly unable to reach
even if i stretched myself out thin
like human laffy taffy, sticking to the roof
of your watering mouth, like a communion wafer
when you’ve been rather sinful
and maybe just as bland—if not blander—
like human laffy taffy, and none the same too sweeter
the childish joke has been on me
but i never sent one over
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are my dull bones broken?
i’m no doctor and it’s far too numb
to agonise over, but sometimes my limbs akimbo
rattle whenever i accidentally hit the
banister on my way up the rickety stairs
to brush the fractured stubs of my broken teeth—
maybe it was just their fragments
i forgot to floss out, jangling a merry little melody
reminding me function—don’t malfunction—
the medicine cabinet’s full of spare parts, so go on
and remember: don’t trip on the second to the last step
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i would never be loved by my dull bones
and not because of them of them, either
i fancy, sometimes, that the tapestry of skin
precariously draped above them would be enough
to make me look close to resembling “someone”
but i can’t even fool myself in front of the mirror
with my spinning head upside-down
so who the hell am i trying to fool—
to impress—to stuff me into a tailored suit
and thread my emptied veins into a wedding dress?
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only me and my dull bones
my dull bones that jut out in strange places
like an abandoned jenga game
my dull bones that never remain in place,
no matter how many times i unpleasantly shove it back in
my dull bones that itch and break(?) and
cower under blanket-stitched skin and protest
whenever i get too comfortable being uncomfortable
living with their afflictions—affections—affectations
and i laugh it off again because
my dull bones feel ticklish; or is that just pain...?
ha-ha-ha. how silly of me to think
i could still be reduced to dull bones—sullen bones—dull stones—
when dull bones are all i’ve ever been.
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