Taped Up Orange Bottles

Popping pills to see what would happen, maybe the pain will lessen or soften. Deep slices on delicate flesh, cordless ropes around innocent necks. Swallow the fear so no one hears the faded tears blended into fake cheers. Wanting to die to figure out if life is real, never the effort, this is how I feel. The voice is all it is, sometimes the thoughts are hard to resist. Struggle to find why I exist, often seeking refuge in my inner abyss. Tired of what’s in my head, the lies I was fed fills me with so much dread. Destructive paths are where I was led, wishing I was dead prevents me from moving ahead. Pain is what you brought, filling my head with ludicrous thoughts. Help is what I sought, hope is why I fought. Everything is rushed, every word is hushed ; I lead to forgiving the ones who left me crushed. I search for what makes me complete, often questioning if things are truly concrete. Trial and error ; hatred has occurred, I reach out for my voice to be heard. I will prevail, you will be shocked at having failed to make me become something i’m not. Hell is where I was led, heaven is where I ended up instead. Left broken from all the times they lied, I finally realized it’s about the beauty inside. I realized all I bottled up in jars, learned to escape from toxic mental bars. To finally accept that all my scars are what makes me a superstar. A hug smile or kiss could do, a simple little gesture from me to you. Learn to live, laugh and love again, the mind is our friend and the world is our heaven.