The Symposium

1.

I sniffed her ass. She had meatballs with a little parsley in them, boiled and not fried. But more important it was that sour smell, a sour smell that would change, that would ripen. She was almost in heat.

I asked her for her name and she peed on the rock for me. Didn't want to talk. I took a deep breath, letting the complexity of her odors coalesce.

Alexis.. what a beautiful name. I sniffed at her ass again. Careful. She's high-born. you could see that easily and she considered herself superior. From a good home and all that...

A sniff is an art. You want to come close, you ache to come close, to smell more, but if your cold, moist nose touches the skin, well.. she'll know you for the mutt you are. I sniffed and enjoyed. The aroma of the meat balls. If she shits, it will taste good.

And she did. Dropping small, dry pellets. Another urge to resist. I'm hungry, I thought, but if she saw me eating that, well... there won't be any chance.

So I sniffed her again, promising myself that I'll come back for those later.

"Alexis is a beautiful name." I said awkwardly.

"Thank you" she said her first actual words. She had the voice I Imagined her to have. Rich and demure and soothing. My heart was racing.

We walked on the newly wet grass, it had rained in the night, and I became self-conscious, worried that my coat had gotten wet. Would that put her off? She didnt seem to be. She didn't seem to care much about me.

"my name's Black Foot, because.."

"Black Foot. Yes.. I got it. "She said. It was obvious that she would not sniff me for all the pork in China. Probably for the best, I wouldnt want her to know what I had last night for dinner.

"I've never seen you this part of the park before" I said, luckily that I managed to stop myself from completely revealing that it's more than just a park for me. That this was where I lived.

"No. first time here for me."

"Want me to show you around?"

"That would be fine, Black Foot."

I started the tour, walking on the soft, wet grass. Our first stop was the notice rock. It had the odor of almost a hundred dogs, or maybe not, I'm not so good at math, everybody peed there.

General queries: "where is the best place to get a meal?" "Does anyone know if the park attendants are dangerous?"

Notices: "golden retriever, 9yrs. Looking for a partner that's fun." and so on.

She sniffed it all, showing disapproval for some, smiling at others, but didnt reply.

"How about this?" she asked.

"What?"

"That notice about the symposium"

"Oh..that" I hadn't noticed it myself. 'A Symposium on canine-human relationship in the age of uncertainty.' With guest speakers and so on and so forth, the usual display of the academic types, jawing their way. I never attended the symposiums if I could help it.

But Alexis..She probably was the cerebral type..

But if I take her there, she'll meet other dogs, and I'll have to get in to those ridiculous pissing contests. Especially if it's someone like her.

but if I refuse to take her? She'll see what a dumbass I am and I wouldn't have any kind of chance.

But hey..it didn't mean I had to take the shortest route..

"well yeah, the symposium is a bit far, though, do you have time to travel? Do you have time? I mean your human .."

"Yes.. I have lots of time." she said. Slightly smiling at my confusion. She sees right through me, I thought.

"Anyway, the symposium starts later on, so we have time."

Time to get my act together, I thought.

2.

Kites, what is the human fascination with kites? They run along the walkway, struggling to get that piece of paper in the air.

"so ridiculous " I explained "they run fast, pulling the kite. When they stop, turn around to watch the thing it falls 'cause no one is pulling it..." we stood over them, on the raised terrace. I could see her smiling a little, just a little.

Maybe just to be polite.

Damm it!

This is one of my best lines!

It usually works for me when I take a girl here, to see the apes in action.

We kept watching the humans goofing around with the kites; first the children would try, fail, try again and fail again, eventually tiring of it, and their parents would come , show them how it's done, and fail just as bad.

And then there were the regulars- people who come there almost every day, or at least every weekend, these are the experts, old an wizened in the ways of kite flying, they had no children to show off to.

We met Samson on the way to the orchard. The little mutt smiled at her, grinning his snub-nose of a grin.

"What have we here?"

Alexis moved slightly to the side and gave a slight sprinkling on a rock for him. a high-born would never introduce herself verbally. But I was very happy that she didn't give him much of her pee to smell, really just a few drops.

Was she saving it for better acquaintances?

But then again, Samson was fixed. His humans had gotten tired of paying the vet every time he got into a fight over a female and had him snipped. If they had done it sooner, at least he wouldnt have lost an eye and most of his tail. There was a patchwork of scars on his stomach and back, monuments to the stitches and the fights he had probably lost. Samson was tough, but not very big.

"How you doing Samson?" I called out to him, denying him the courtesy of replying Alexis in kind, and not giving him an Impetus to sniff her ass. He would probably touch his whole wet nose in there and she'll bite him herself.

"Can't complain. You hear about Sweet?"

"No, what happened?"

"The stupid bastard ate rat poison. Again! I mean if you see a human, in a yellow overall putting a bunch of these food pellets around, I mean...no free lunches right?"

"Well, like you said, he is a stupid idiot" a concurred, momentarily forgetting that I was entertaining a lady.

"So is he dead?"

"No. but if you stayed by the pond last night, the big pond, not the small one.."

"Yes?"

"He was there, howling all night like crazy, throwing up everywhere. I come over to him and say 'Sweet-didn't know you had so much in you!!' but I saw him this morning, going over the trash near that kiosk so I guess he's back to his usual nasty self"

"He's lucky to be alive. "

"You're kidding? They dont put enough of these pellets to kill ol' Sweet" he said, turning to Alexis "I mean, he takes a mouthful of these, says to himself 'these taste funny' and than tastes the rest just to be sure that it's rat poison. But that dog is so big and so fat that they would need to deliver the pellets in a truck"

Alexis didn't smile. She seemed bored. And the crude language that Samson used was beneath her. We said our farewells and left.

3.

A grove, an orchard where the humans grow fruit, but not in this park, these fruit trees are not meant to produce. No lemon trees or peach or plum. Just long rows of cedars and pines, with winding cement walkways between them, shaded, and cool.

We avoided the hard cement and treaded on the rotting, damp needles. A wonderful smell of earth.

"This is my favorite part in the park" I confessed, as we walked on the slight slope of an artificial hill. "When I feel like I need to think, or just enjoy a moment of silence, I come here.

"It is very relaxing" she agreed but seemed cold. Distant, thinking to herself.

"Are you ok?" I asked.

"Yes." She said hesitantly, "why do you ask?"

I could not say anything. So I didn't answer. We kept walking.

"Tell me about your humans. Are they nice?" I asked her.

"Yes, they are a nice family. A young couple. They had one son, and two years after that, twins."

"Twins? I didn't know humans have litters. How amazing"

"It's not a litter, just the two. Very noisy. And the parents are very busy. Three young children. " she said. " but I have my own place. Near the TV... It's warm there in the winter. The man likes me a bit more than the woman but they both take care of Me." she said, and somehow I saw that this last statement was causing her some confusion.

"I have a human too"

"Really?" she said, surprised.

"Yes. I'm not like all those street dogs here. I have a human as well."

"Ok" she said.

"He comes every day, in the evening, brings me food in nylon bags. Sometimes it's sausage in tomato sauce, sometimes it's some fried chicken. "

"But you don't live at his place?"

"No. I don't. I own him, but he's free enough to go home"

"Don't you mean the other way around?" she said, smiling.

"No, I own him. He brings me food. He pets me. But I don't have to go to his home to get it. It's much better. Nobody sticks me in an apartment all day long with nothing to do but to count the floor tiles"

"Is that what you think I do ?"

"I didn't say that. I just said that this way is better for me. I enjoy all the benefits of owning a human, but none of the drawbacks."

"I see" she said. Hesitantly. "Still, it's nice to be indoors when it rains. "

"It does. But I find places where I can keep warm and dry when I need."

"So you think that my way of life is worse than yours."

"Not at all. If you like that kind of life you can have it. I mean, I've just met you today, but you strike me as an intelligent, free-spirited dog right?" I said, slipping in a compliment.

"I guess so"

"So. You obviously live the way you do because it's what you like best. And if you like something you can have it. If you don't, just change things. "

"I see.. And how about Samson? He looked a bit ragged"

"Oh. him? " I said, unhappy that she turned the discussion over to other dogs. "Well.. He lives here, but he doesn't own a human. He used to. But he got fixed, so he ran out. Doesn't like humans much. On the other hand, he's crazy about cats. Goes dancing with them whenever he can."

"Yes, I could see the scratch marks. " she answered. Smiling.

"I have another question"

"Yes?"

"What are you required to do? I mean, you own how many, five? Six humans? What are you..eh.. Required to do?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you told me about your apartment and the babies. But, what are your responsibilities over there?"

"Responsibilities?"

"Yes"

"Like what?"

"I don't know, chasing rats out, or barking at strangers, or licking their hands.."

"Licking their hands?"

"Yes. I would say that this is my only responsibility to my human, he gives me food, and I lick his fingers from the grease" this made her laugh for a moment.

"Ok, I would say that I have some responsibilities. If there's a stranger coming, it's expected that I bark. I mean they would more often than not tell me to shut up, but I know that deep in their heart they are quite pleased that I'm keeping them safe."

"Ok. What else?"

"Just keep them company. Humans need love more than anything. And if you show them love, well.. it makes their life happier."

"Your humans seem very needy. Aren't they?"

"They are. Very needy. not so much now that they have the twins, but they are still in need of me to show them affection. "

She fell silent. "But from what you say, the human that you own is just the same. He would come, bring you food, and he needs you to show him some love. Doesn't he?"She fell silent.

"He does, but maybe he's a bit more crude then the humans you own. You should hear him talk, as he pets me. I mean the words that come out of his mouth are just crazy. I think maybe he has problems. I've heard it said that even humans have psychological problems sometimes. But maybe this is because youre a high-born. I'm clearly not. Not even close, so I could only get this poor, lonely, crazy bastard"

"I see." she said. "Maybe mine are better. But of course sometimes they get angry at me. It's even funny sometimes." She said smiling, remembering something. "I mean, I usually control myself, but it is fun sometimes to get them riled up. Let them sweat a bit. You know, appreciate what they got"

"No. I wouldn't, that poor guy is the only human I ever owned. "

She said no more, now deep in thought. I let the matter go and we continued on.

We found a fire hydrant, dripping water down. Was this the law with fire hydrants, that they could not keep their water in check?

We had a slow drink. Refreshing cold water. Here was a place were birds sang, and there was a soothing noise. The sounds and that damp smell of rotting leaves, a heaviness that I always associated with death. You die and you are covered in this mass, slowly become part of if. How rich and luxurious it must be. I could smell her again. She was apprehensive about something but I could still not tell what.

4.

A slight rise in the earth, made in crescent shape was where the symposium was to be held. All around-trees, but humans rarely walked near this place, except of course the odd child; Human children seem to have the worst possible sense of direction. They get lost even in the middle of the park, and start crying until somebody takes them to the police station, and they call for the parent on the screechy speakers, would something something come to the information booth and pick up the little runt..

We arrived just as a learned Dalmatian, slim and clearly high-born had concluded his lecture. Some grunted in respect. He walked away from the center of the stage, his tail raised in pride.

I don't know why , but I have never liked high-born males. There was always something about them. maybe too clean, I don't know. High-born females, however, like Alexis was a dream for me. I was glad we missed that twerp.

Next came an old mutt. Tall and thin, with mangy grey fur. Good. Somebody that would actually have something to say:

"Thank you Dr. Rolls for your wise words" he said, he had a sober, throaty voice. "Friends. My name is Maxwell and I'm a historian. I would like to give today a historic context to the relationship between human and canine.

Let's first identify how canines live besides humans today. I can put it very shortly indeed-not good. The truth of the matter is that it has never been worse.

Many thousands of years ago, our ancestors had chosen to own humans. Perhaps it started when we saw how useful they were in providing food for us; we were in the woods, traveling, half starved, and the reason for our starvation was the human's success. So somewhere, we made a decision; We will tolerate their demands of us in exchange for the food we needed- And it worked. We got what we wanted, and humans became more and more dependant on us. Dependant on our senses, on our instincts, on our compassion." he said, clearing his throat for a moment.

"and this dependency led to a sense in us of ownership. We aren't their partners, a partner you can take or leave.

Partnership also implies equality. And there certainly none of that. we provided safety forf them and kept them as happy as they could be, and they gave us what we needed. But it was clear who had the upper hand in this relationship. So a sense of ownership was created within us. and with ownership, naturally, comes responsibility. We feel responsibility for our property. Sometimes we even come to love them. So Things were good for us. We went with the humans wherever they wanted to go and cohabitated every spot on the plant, with us as a dominating force.

How much power did we have back then? It must have been Immeasurable. An uneducated hunter-gatherer relied on our judgment; whether something was safe or not, whether they can trust this person or that. We needed only to show dislike, or bare our teeth a little and they would get the message. That way we could steer them on a better course. And thus their dependency deepened. Even today, we see examples for this; I have talked with many police dogs who practically govern affairs for the policemen. humans have such blunted senses, much more then their ancestors, that they can't even smell the aroma of cannabis.

Now let's face it- it was for the better. We are, after all superior to them. And unlike them, we are generally benign. But things could not have stayed like this forever; Humans are individualists. They seek freedom. And they sensed their dependence on us, and loathed themselves for it.

And so they forced themselves into changing their existence, their livelihood, to one where they are less dependant on us. We call this change the agricultural revolution.

The first step was a mere emulation, or transposition of the canine-human relationship to other species. Like we controlled them They started controlling herds of cows and sheep.

And all of this, still because they couldn't stand being owned by us! But what do you know- with all that livestock, They seemed to need us even more! Because these animals were even more vulnerable , more unintelligent than the humans! They had to start worrying about wolves and lions and tigers killing their newly-domesticated animals. So instead of losing their dependence on us, they in fact grew to be more so. And we were required to facilitate their needs, of course to our benefit as well.

But As you can guess, this greater dependence was exactly what they tried to escape. And so they developed their agriculture further in hope of distancing themselves from us.

They began to sow the earth, and grow crops. This by the way was a dietary change that they were not equipped for, I mean, just look how fat they are!" he paused with this anecdote, some laughed. But it was obvious that this crowed wasn't big on humor.

"But now in the farms, they still needed us," he continued "to scare away the crows, and the foxes. To warn them from thieves. So they were still unable to break free. But the dream of freedom from dogs never died in them. At this stage this unfulfilled dream had new manifestations to antagonize us they began to have CATS, which have absolutely no actual value to them. But this antagonism was not enough to give them the freedom that they needed. So they escalated their hate. They began to have dog fights and used our name as derogatory expressions. And most Important-they began to leave their farms, moving slowly to villages and then to towns. There, the need for us , at least as guards against the wildlife is indeed reduced. But here again- they could not escape the need for us. Because their new, communal kind of existence; living in such close proximity to each other, demanded a way to settle disputes and protect humans from other humans! And we were asked again to guard homes, from thieves and murderers, even to serve in their wars.

Here new change happened; the more they settled in cities, escaping their comfortable servitude to us, the more they began to look on us with nostalgia. Their idyll of the country life isn't complete without the friendly loyal dog. And we utilized this of course to increase our sense of ownership. I mean, if you could, wouldn't you? so this love-hate relationship continued, they hate us , and they need us. for changing reasons. " he said. Pausing again, slightly out of breath.

"But now, my dear friends we come to our recent history. And things are indeed not good. Up until the last century, humans found us quite indispensible; we were efficient guards, we were a psychological crutch for them, especially in their increasingly confusing urban existence.

now , however, we find ourselves in a new era. Developments in how they build their home

have all but eliminated our role as guards, either from man or animal and those electronic contraptions called televisions are superior to us in entertaining them and giving them existential comfort.

More and more we see humans unowned by dogs. Or if they have dogs, they choose to have smaller, less 'doglike' dogs. Excuse me, by the way, if this offends you." he apologized.

"And they use elaborate justifications for this; it's cruel to keep a large dog in a city apartment. it's too expensive. This is nothing less then a shirking off of their dependency on us as their owners! This is the escape they had dreamed about so long.

Of course the hate that humans had long held for dogs, has never died! They tried all these many years to break free, they had to completely change their lifestyles to facilitate this so-called freedom, at their own terrible expense!

But now their goal is finally at hand. They are alienated enough and eventually will be independent enough to succeed now where they could not have before.

Do not be deceived by the pampering that you receive. And some of you do receive much, of that I can see! Some of you are dressed in clothes and treated like human babies. A clear example of displacement if there ever was one! The rest-even if you are lucky enough to still own a human, you are a chore to them, a chore that exists by a declining norms. Inertia snd no more. An excuse is all it takes to have a dog put through intolerable cruelties like castration or worse yet, abandonment. Just think about the idea of castration. It is nothing short of the prevention of the next generation!

Who would have thought this possible only a generation ago? And if this is the present generation, can we not see the next? Will the next generation be kinder, when it's obvious that their entire civilization is based on our removal? Today we can't enter public buildings, tomorrow; we will be altogether abandoned or worse. Don't be fooled by the apparent development of new purposes for us. It is true that they now use us to find bombs, and guide the blind. But even as we speak, new technologies are being developed to replace these newly-found uses. They are working hard at this and rest assured that they will succeed!

And don't forget the cruelties committed against us. ..."

Alexis moved away from the congregation of the listeners, she obviously had heard enough.

5.

I followed after her silently. She obviously did not know where she was going, but I didn't dare interfere with her thoughts. something was on her mind. So we walked on. I will get us both out of any path she leads. I thought.

We reached a section of the park that was flat, and was filled with marble and bronze statues all of the realist variety. Men and women , heroically posing. Presumably the greatest and noblest of the humans; here a man holding a rolled scroll, with a raised hand, as if preaching, his sermon long lost in time. Another one, of a young naked woman, holding a tennis racket.

Beside the statues, the expanse was filled with benches, and weeping willows. Their branches now green with new growth after the bitter winter.

Alexis finally stopped in front of a bronze statue of two men, wrestling each other. They had a strange expression of joy on their face.

She started crying.

I was surprised and rushed closer. She was of course not surprised by my appearance. I made no attempt to hide the fact that I was following her.

"They left me here. " she said, crying Quietly.

"Who?"

"Who Who?!! Who do you think? you stupid mutt." She rasped. Clearly in pain, it hurt a bit to hear her say that.

"How do you know?"

"They.. we..Live on the other side of town. They drove almost two hours to bring me here. They gave me a good meal, patted me and walked back to the car."

So that was it! Everything made sense. This is why she was so quiet.

"I mean they had the first baby, and they lost sleep over it, but with the help of the nanny, they managed to take me out every day. But after the twins were born, I've felt them getting colder and colder to me. They were fighting over me too. And today the woman shouted at me when I hesitated going into the car. Don't you see? I'm abandoned now. And what can I do?!"

I thought for a while how to cheer her up. It is a rare thing to see a being so superior fall so low.

There was this bitter, ache at the roof of my mouth, the feeling I get. I used to have it when I was young, just before crying. Just before the tears flowed. Now the tears are gone. I never cry, but this bitter feeling I still feel sometimes.

We kept silent for a long time. The wind started blowing, ruffling the old fallen willow leaves, and the bows bending slightly, showing their respect to the wind.

"Well." I started. "From all the places to be abandoned at, nothing beats the park. I mean.. Look at me. I'm a street dog by all accounts, but I'm fat! I'm practically waddling around. So don't worry about it, in no time, you'll see what a stroke of luck this is for you. And.."

"And?"

"If you want to own a human again. It's relatively easy. Humans after all are so easy to manipulate. And you , you are not a simple dog like me, you are high-born and everyone can see that. You're the type of dog that people pay for at the pet store. "

"I don't know how to acquire humans. How to ..get them to want to take care of me"

"Why not?"

"My humans got me as a present from one of their friends; I never had to work at keeping them"

"So?"

"So, I'm not sure if I can do that. What if what that Maxwell guy said was true? What if I can't find a human? I'll live on garbage like a rat?"

I saw where this is going. She actually took seriously the bullshit she heard in that lecture!!

Why is it when we are down we seem to be open to the worst possible ideas? Why can't we be optimistic when we're in need of it?

"Alexis. You seem like an intelligent dog. Why do you take what that idiot said seriously? Don't you know that this symposium is just another in a series for him? Next week it will be about our relations with cats, maybe titled 'why can't we get alone? Contemporary thought about Canine dog-relations ' and later on it would be something else. If you listen to that, and take it seriously it would be good for only getting more depressed. And definitely not good for you. I always say-screw those egg heads" I explained.

"I'll tell you what, if by this time next week you wont be owning at least one human, I'll..I'll..I'll sniff Samson's butt!"

This made her laugh a bit.

"But today, if you would like .. I can take you to my human. Like I said, he's crazy, but I'm pretty sure you will like his cooking. Just remember to lick those fingers. Does that sound good?"

"It sounds good"

And we walked on. It was late afternoon and we had some time to kill before my human came..