Biodegradable

I was something before that fated moment.

I was something special in your eyes, you hands and most especially your heart. I think of how it felt seconds before it ended. Where I became the thing that you simply looked at and shrugged and didn't need me anymore.

I remember when we first met. What felt like minutes ago. You waited for me. The line was busy on that particular that day. But you were craving something, and when you saw my name illuminated under cheap lights, you chose me.

That was just minutes before I was ever loved, wanted. Hell, even needed. But I didn't understand the desperation of that type of want until I found myself against this hardness seconds before red turned to green.

Let's back it up quite a bit.

This wasn't the first time I had heard the stories. I've even heard about my friends being returned - untouched - because they weren't "so and so" what they want.

I heard the murmurs, that the customer is always right. I guess we are always going to return to the place we begin.

For the most part of my existence, I did a lot of traveling. I wished for the day I would be warmed up by what they called was care and wanting. They always referred to us to being easy to love because we were fast, ready and good for the at least the most part the soul. So I waited so patiently, knowing one day it would be my chance.

I traveled through a state or so, never really seeing the world, but I always overheard their words. The cravings, the lust, the want, and mostly the desire at the late hours. I didn't care what time it was, to be just be desired was enough.

But regardless, of the infinite amount of never really understanding what they meant of the rumors of being smashed and discarded, I still could care less. That wouldn't be me, I was destined for much more.

I heard about this place through the others. Something that said cuold be considered the most notable place to be in this city. Well, notable or popular or convenient. Not sure, but I was optimistic.

It sounded wonderful. So many others that I had travelled with had told stories about how lucky and appreciated we would be there. That we would be truly loved...to pieces. I always wanted to know how they were doing once I heard them creak away. Silently, wishing them the best of luck, jealousy creeping as burning as a freezer burn.

I was always so patient. I knew my time would come. I heard the creak off the tires as they stopped. But it was the first time, I felt the gentle, but somewhat unsteady hands of what was followed by a gruff breath near me.

I felt as we moved, my entire being swelled. So giddy was this anticipation that I hoped would finally be what I had always wanted.

Instead the unfamiliar conversations followed, indistinct voices and again more creaking. I felt us stop abruptly. I shivered. It was even colder wherever we are at now. I wasn't sure whether there had been a mistake. I thought they spoke of warmth. The ones that ended up being sent back. They said it wasn't because they were wrong, they were just a mistake for that person.

I felt so bad because I could hear them cry silently, and then there were no more cries. Sometimes, I fear that I will be the one that will be on the front lines waiting, thrill running through me....and then the almost immediate disturbance of a final dream taken away so suddenly.

I held myself to the resolve that that would not be the case. Not me, I was destined for the what I have been hoping for since my creation. Warmth.

It felt like much more than an eternity when I heard the crackle. The blue eyes that looked down, I expected something much more, but they barely glanced for a second. The confusion started to set in.

Immediately, before I knew it, I was with next to my friends, who had shared the wonderment and dreams with me since we could remember.

It happened so fast though. I heard my name being called. What? So soon? It felt like seconds before they started to wrap me. Ah, the warmth! I knew they hadn't been lying!

Eventually, I was snugging up next to some good old friends. I could feel their own relief near mine swelled up in anticipation.

The hand off seemed a bit pushy, but I decided it was because they were just as excited about me as I was of them.

But the rough set down did shake my spirit slightly, almost an afterthought. I could feel a slight hope pass. It's much darker than I thought. I always assumed there would be light.

Soon, their hands came though shuffling among my friends and I. Something much smaller than expected wrapping around my being. Unwrapping slowly. I felt a halt, pause two times. I realized I never knew what came to fruition after the beginning.

But suddenly, there was a random jolt, and I felt the wave of warm wind. I heard an exasperated yell during my propelment. "I told you not to keep the window down!"

"Well, you shouldn't have slammed on your breaks!" Another voice.

"Well, grab the other one. We are late."

I heard screeching as I hit very roughly. I laid there, this type of warming was uncomfortable.

I barely heard them saying, "It's ok they are biodegradable." And as the voice faded away, quickly after, "Well, most of it is."