Call me Ingrid

The bitter liquid is warm in my hand. My cold, blue eyes are frozen in the distance upon a sign that says, "You can't buy happiness, but you can buy alcohol and that's close enough."

I chuckle as I shoot the liquid to the back of my throat. It burns, but it's a welcomed burn.

"Another, Ms. Williams?"asks the bartender.

"Please, just call me Emily, and make it a double," I say.

He nods, "You got it...Emily."

His warm green eyes and inviting smile give me a sense of ease I haven't felt since I became "Emily Williams".

Ah, Emily Williams. The the day I created that alias, I never imagined it would reach these heights. The name would be plastered on every magazine, billboard, television and any empty space that could be filled for the public to consume.

Emily Williams, model, actress, singer, writer and CEO of a soon to be Fortune 500 company.

She has it all; beauty, money, fame and access to any man she wants at any time. What more could she want? Emily may say nothing, but Ingrid would disagree.

Ingrid Schmidt, the invisible girl. She was plain but sharp. The world wouldn't see her, but she would make them. Her parents abandoned her at an orphanage when she was three years old, and she would be on the streets before she was 16. Ingrid dreamed of having a family, a home and all the things she'd never known. Instead, fame found her, fortune became her, and life would never be the same. Ingrid Schmidt would change her brown locks to blond, her hourglass figure would form and Emily Williams would be born.

Yet, even as Emily, Ingrid would dream of her parents' return, and one day she would get her wish. As Emily Williams spread across the globe, the parents that abandoned her would find her. They'd use Ingrid to feed their addictions, steal from her, and break her heart once again.

Any remnants of Ingrid and the dreams she once possessed would die an agonizing death within Emily, and Emily's focus would not surpass money, fame nor self-preservation. She'd refuse her hand to various men, find a different bed each night and never stay in one place for too long lest her past, thoughts and loneliness caught up to her.

"Here you go, Ms- I mean Emily", says the bartender as he hands me my drink, and a noticeable silver band on his left hand glimmers under the bar light.

"Thank you," I say as I take drink and swirl it in my hand.

"Tell me..." I squint to read his name tag, "Jesse...what would you do with a million dollars right now?"

Jesse looks at me bewildered, as others before him often have.

"What do you mean?" he asks.

"I mean, if someone gave you a million dollars right now, what would you do with it?" I say persistently.

Without hesitation Jesse says, "I'd buy a house. My wife is pregnant, and we always dreamed of having a house to start our family. I was hoping I'd have enough saved but the baby came sooner than I thought."

I'd gotten a lot of answers over the years but none as sincere as this one.

"Hm," I say as a I take a sip, "how long have you been married?"

"Five years," he says.

"And what are you having?"

"A girl," he responds as he lights up, "I'm terrified, but I also can't wait. She'll be daddy's little girl."

I clear my throat in a grim attempt to mask my tears.

"Do you guys have a name?" I ask choked up.

"The wife and I can't agree. I wanted to name her Ingrid after my late grandmother, but the wife isn't a fan. Says it sounds too old-timey," he says.

I laugh. I always thought it sounded old-timey too.

"What's so funny?" he asks.

"Nothing,"I say. "nothing at all. That's a beautiful dream."

I pause, "Can I please get the check to close out the tab?"

"Sure." Jesse turns to go but stops, "I'm sorry to ask, you think I can also get an autograph for the wife? She's a huge fan, and actually so am I..." His cheeks turn a rosy hue.

"Absolutely," I say.

His smile stretches ear to ear, like a child left alone in a candy store. To think one signature could make someone so happy.

Jesse returns with a check in a holder.

I take the holder. "Thanks."

I wave a hundred dollars in front of him before I put it inside the holder on my lap and tell him to keep the change.

"Oh wow," he stammers, "thank you. I'll put it towards the house fund,"he jokes.

I keep the holder and pull out a piece of paper from my purse.

"Who am I making this out to?"

He says, "Oh, right, the autograph. Jesse and Laney Hanks please."

I fill out the piece of paper, put it in the holder atop the hundred dollar bill, close it and give it back to Jesse.

"I hope your dreams come true," I say as I down the drink and begin to leave.

I leave Jesse giddy with joy, but before I can step foot outside the bar he stops me from behind. I turn around to see that all the color has drained from his face and the piece of paper is in his hand.

"Ms-Emily, this is a check. A check for a million dollars, you must have made a mistake. I can't take this."

He tries to hand it back to me with trembling hands. I tighten his grip around the check and push his hands back.

"Yes, you can and you will. It's for you and your family. You deserve to have a house you can make a home in for your daughter."

His mouth is agape, his green eyes wide and moistened by tears. He can't seem to find the words to speak until he simply says with a quavering voice, "Thank you, Emily."

"Please...call me Ingrid," I say as I walk away.