11/2015

I've always just wanted someone's recognition; but instead I pick up bad habits.

Always doing the same things; repetition.

I would always search for a man with the unrealistic characteristic that would seem idealistic to my simplistic life.

And then I would think, so what?

My feelings then hitting me like and uppercut. I would then start avoiding things, going around, taking any short cut.

My emotions never let me be one to fit in,

I always feel like an intrusion,

OR

Is it all in my head; like an illusion?

Cause I can never help to come to the conclusion,

That if I was to find the perfect guy,

It would be one big delusion.

Some of my relationships were abusive,

Not physically but mentally,

Always being intrusive.

So now even years after its hard for my brain to adjust and for people to gain my trust,

Because in the past people have used me and everything they've earned turned to dust.