Some Houses & a Home

Home meant spacious front porches and people coming and going as they please.

Home meant childhood imagination with a beginning dose of sibling rivalry.

Home meant first friends both of the human variety and of the fur covered. It meant adventures to be had.

Home meant love, or so I thought. It meant family until it didn't anymore.

Leaving home meant oceans and change. It meant truths being revealed.

Times were brief and waves ever changing.

Straight A's and toothy smiles slowly turned into being average and a bout of never ending tears.

Sickness entered my life which in turn caused my childish youth to exit.

Moving time came around again, another house never to be a home.

Money was tight and the familial lightness I once knew faded.

Running from life again to an escape so free I could practically touch the sky.

Then there were ponies and lifelong dreams coming true. The lightness had returned for a while at least.

And then came more sickness and a distance was created.

Ponies and dreams come to life rode away and with them they took my almost home.

I tasted death for the first time in my short life and embraced my own darkness.

Laughter and love became scorn and loathing.

Mommy and daddy lost love and I lost myself.

Colorful watercolor paintings transitioned into drawings of pain on my arms in deep shades of red.

This particular cage lasted longer than all the others, but still never grew into a home.

Daddy left mommy and the light left my eyes. My family was torn apart and so was my heart.

Tattered shreds were all that remained of both, a reminder never to get too comfortable.

Time kept moving and so did we, but my soul was at a standstill.

Inevitably it was time for another journey away from reality.

The time had come for another move, but as always we are merely passing through.

Nomads for life that's the way it seems. Never anywhere long enough to make new dreams.

Though I'm settled for now my weary heart knows the truth, my family will never again be at home under one roof.