Mind of Ben

I really should have put a coaster under that cup. I'm tired of this vape flavor. I thought kiwi passionfruit was going to be good, but it is actually gross. I really think I need to shower. I know that I showered yesterday, but I can start to smell me which is gross. Emmett (my cat) is messing with a tiny little toy mouse. I'm kind of thrilled about this as the cat doesn't play with anything. There is lot of worry surrounding me right now. What is my life going to look like when I leave for Hawaii to complete my doctorate? What's going to happen with my relationship? I've always hated long distance relationships, but I am in love with my partner. I'm worried that this move is going to break us up instead of glue us together. At the same time, I'm worried that the relationship might be doomed. I'm also worried about failing. My collegiate career thus far has been successful, but leaving my home and support is a huge risk. Life is all about risks and I know that this will be a great thing for me to pursue. But what happens if I fail? What happens if I succeed? Why is Emmett fighting with my other cat Max?

I really hate ketchup. The smell grosses me out and the taste is worse than that. I really need to find someone to wax my eyebrows and I need to get my haircut. Maybe I will go get a new vape, but I will need to shower.