Have I loved?

At the age of 18, I fell in love with someone who in the moment made me feel calm and happiness something I hadn't felt in years or maybe more then a couple of years sooner or later you lose track. Growing up I thought that by being with someone you loved meant that they could cheat and make you feel so unwanted and used because that meant they loved you. To me that was their way of showing interest, so I at the time didn't know what was considered a healthy loving relationship. So, continuing on I had always dated those who made me apologize to them for their wrong doings to me and made me feel bad if I didn't as they said, and at times when we had fights I always apologized first because I didn't want them to leave me. But then I found my calm my other half which sounds like Im not old enough to be considered having an other half but that what he is. he guides me when Im going down a dark path tells me everything will be ok. My first, healthy love, but although its healthy due too all my past relationships I always wondered when he would leave me, or make me feel terrible and apologize to him. He, of course would reassure me and tell me how I was his everything, how nothing and no one would ever tear us apart because without him he wouldn't make it. He would pick me flowers from the side of the road because he knew those would always mean more to me then any bouquet bought from the store. I would spend every other day with him, morning till night. I even met his parents, his parents were the most sweet people anyone could ever have and on my birthdays they would pick me flowers from their yard and give them to me because they couldn't afford much which always made me happy and as they did that he would slowly slip away from me, forgetting anniversaries and soon birthdays. His parents, of course would tell me that the flowers were from him and how he would never forget but most anyone who has been down this path knows thats never the truth. So, just like that I was just there existing not wanting to leave because I loved him and although I knew I wasn't happy, how could I leave the person who told me they loved me and I them. Well, week's pass and the texts stop coming, calls cease to exist and now I am back to my past texting them asking why, if theres anything I can do for them to love me again, for me to exist to them like the first time they ever said those three words. I never did get answer, but his parents still love me as their own and even though I don't keep in contact, it's been said they grow me flowers every year on my birthday. It's been three years.