I’m ready.

School is starting next week. And I think I'm ready.

I'm ready to study as hard as I can.

I'm ready to ace all of my tests.

I'm ready to pass my AP tests.

I'm ready to make all of my teachers proud of me.

I'm ready to be the teacher's good example for work

I'm ready to prepare myself for the misfortune of group projects, doing everyone's work for them, only for them to get the same grade as I did.

I'm ready to meet all of my friends again.

I'm ready to laugh and smile and listen to music in the hallways.

I'm ready to meet my new teachers

meet new friends

and meet new classmates.

I'm ready to embarrass myself when I get a question wrong

and I'm ready for everyone to laugh at me because I was stupid

I'm ready to sit alone during lunch every single day

because all of my friends have different lunch periods

having at least one person they know that they can talk to, while I have no one

I'm ready to write my book during lunch

I'm ready to write my book during my free time

I'm ready to feel alone again

I'm ready to feel lonely

I'm ready to watch everyone laugh and smile with their friends while a stabbing sensation in my stomach invades my mindspace

knowing that I won't be able to have that same feeling

I'm ready for my mental health to drain

I'm ready to feel like I don't belong, no matter where I go

I'm ready to feel burnt out after I finish my school work

I'm ready to set high expectations for myself, and then the results would be the complete opposite of what I wanted

I'm ready to be scared of making new friends

knowing the last time I tried to make new friends

they hurt me badly

I'm ready to lose my friends

I'm ready to lose everyone I love

I'm ready to lose myself

I'm ready to cry over anything that was under a 100%

I'm ready to not let myself relax

I'm ready to be resilient over wandering bullies

I'm ready to beat myself up everytime I did something wrong

I'm ready.

I'm not ready.

4:48 P.M.