Lust is Forever

Have you ever thought you loved someone, and then after it ends, you realize that it was just some twisted form of lust?

I realized that after my last relationship.

I constantly craved his touch, even just hugs and holding my hand.

We never... well, you know-

And I realized that maybe that was all he wanted.

And that's why he ended it.

But I feel stupid saying that I really believed it when he said he loved me.

He told me everyday, right before, or after, he kissed me.

Sometimes both.

And when we texted into the late hours of the night, I really thought it was jut out of convenience.

Because you see, I'm that one girl that never believes anyone could possibly desire her, at least not in that way.

I push people away without even realizing the possibilities of the relationship.

I limit myself without even realizing I'm doing so.

So to answer the question being asked, no, I don't think that lust always wins.

But in my experience, it doesn't just go away.

Lust is the reason why so many people get hurt, or do stupid things, and I don't want to hurt forever.

I don't want to be stuck on him forever just because I wanted him at one point in time.