Harry Situation Reviews: Five Nights at Freddy’s (The Movie)
Happy Halloween, everyone!
Halloween is without a doubt my favorite holiday next to Christmas. And what better way to celebrate such a spooky holiday than to review a spooky movie. The long-awaited Five Nights at Freddy's.
Five Nights at Freddy's is a horror film based on the popular video game franchise of the same name. The film stars Josh Hutchinson, Elizabeth Lail, Piper Rubio, Mary Stuart Masterton, and Matthew Lillard. The film centers around a troubled security guard named Mike (played by Josh Hutchinson), who takes a night-time job at Freddy's Fazbear's Pizza, a family entertainment center that has been abandoned since the 1980s. Upon taking the job, he quickly learns that the four main animatronic mascots — Bonnie, Chica, Foxy, and Freddy Fazbear — come to life on their own, and have a thirst for murder. I mean, what would you expect from animatronics that are possessed by the souls of murdered children, am I right?
I'll first start off by stating that I am not a fan of the Five Nights at Freddy's video games. I've only ever played the first one and even then, I never understood why people were so into it, and still are to this day. Maybe it's the fact that so many Youtube gamers showed off different videos of themselves playing these games and seeing their reactions is what draws people to these games.
A film adaptation was announced almost a decade ago, but has been in development hell for a while, until now. Now that the Five Nights movie has been released I can say that this movie was terrible, but goddamn did I have some fun watching it.
There really aren't too many positives for this movie. I'll give it this, the movie was funny. Goddamn, I laughed so hard at this movie. But that is also serves as the biggest problem. While it's meant to be a horror movie, there were too many moments that had me laughing at the movie, not with it.
Which leads me to the real issue with this movie: it's not scary. You would think that a game mainly famous for its jumpscares would help motive the writers to try to come up with a few of their own. But no, the "scares" are so few and far between and they barely get a reaction out of me.
The story is very predictable too. Any sort of "twists" or "revelations" that this movie had in store for its audience I saw them all coming. Could the story be any more linear? Hell, if you've casted Matthew Lillard in your movie, you already know he's going to be secretly a killer. We've all seen Scream before. It's nothing new.
The characters are also bland as hell. We spend so much focus on Josh Hutchinson's character without any real reason to care for him. They tacked on the idea that he's looking out for his kid sister (played by Piper Rubio), and the fact he's desperately searching for information to what may have happened to his lost little brother. But in the end, I just don't care. He's not very interesting, and he barely expresses himself aside from maybe two different emotions. There is also a police officer (played by Elizabeth Lail) who is supposed to have a connection with Freddy Fazbear's Pizza, but her main purpose throughout the movie is to dump dialogue to the audience.
But despite this movie being terrible, I did have a good laugh about it. Honestly, this movie is on par with say Manos, the Hands of Fate or Samurai Cop. A movie so bad that it's entertaining. Besides, I get the feeling that this movie made to cater towards fans of the franchise, which mainly consists of kids, teens, and Youtube gamers. This movie was for them, not for me, despite trying so hard to appeal to newcomers of the franchise. So if you're a fan of these games, this one's for you. If you're looking for something stupid and fun, then enjoy your stay at Freddy Fazbear's Pizza.
Positives:
-I laughed so hard at this movie
Negatives:
-Predictable story
-No real scares
-Bland characters
Final Grade: F
So those are my thoughts on Five Nights at Freddy's. Have you seen it? What were your thoughts on it? Have you played any of the games? What are your thoughts on those? Please be kind, leave a like and comment, and check out more reviews here on Prose!
Best Quote:
Mike Schmidt: "What's the pay?"
Steve Raglan: "Not great."
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