Too long

Sometimes I think I've lived too long. It's a ridiculous thought to have at 23 but I don't think I'm supposed to be here. I think I was supposed to die when I was 16. It's a weird feeling like I'm here but I'm not supposed to be. I feel like I'm just kind of walking through life not living it. I have no idea what I am doing. I'm not living for me I'm simply here because I don't want to hurt the few people who care about me. I don't know what to do. Is there a way to stop feeling like this? Is there a way to feel like I'm supposed to be here? How do I start living my life? How do I start living instead of just existing?