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Monthly Stream of Consciousness Challenge for April.
After one year of a really, really bad relationship, where you had to sacrifice your writing because of a passive-aggressive, dramatic partner who slowly but surely pulled you away from it, they've finally left your life, and you're back behind the typewriter, and you're mad that you were suckered away from it like you were for so long. Winner is decided by likes, and will receive a crisp $10.00 -Let it flow.

Wasted

Wasted. One whole year, wasted.

How many hours could I have spent doing what I wanted to do? How much closer could I be to a finished product, a project that might actually get published? How close could I have been to my dream career? How many ideas did I ignore, discarded because they were less important, less worthy of my time?

And what do I have to show for it? For a year, I told myself it was worth it. For the man who supposedly loved me, it was worth setting aside my passion. I traded my lifelong goals for eternal happiness. So I thought. And now? Now, I have nothing but bad memories, feminine rage, and a sour taste in my mouth.

How could I have been so stupid? So naïve? How could I ever have thought some guy was worth all that? Did I want my happily ever after so badly that I was willing to sacrifice the person I want to be? To sacrifice myself for some guy?

Never again. I’ve been away from my desk for too long, but I won’t make that mistake again. This is who I am. This is who I want to be. Who I will be. My loves will be flowing prose, detailed narration, interesting characters, snappy dialog, engaging stories. Stories about adventure, longing, excitement, love. Love lost. Love found. Love cherished more than life itself. Love that lasts forever.

Why do I have to be such a romantic?

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