When the regular fantasies fail
I couldn’t help myself. I was so tired and couldn’t sleep. I’d been playing with myself for the better part of an hour but I just kept coming up to the edge. Having you tie me down for others to use, having people all around me, masturbating over me. None of it worked. I just couldn’t get myself there. I knew what the problem was. I was owned by you and without your permission, I wasn’t going to be able to come. But how? I knew you’d not been on.
The pleasure and the pain at having abused my clit for so long was wearing thin, and I wasn’t sure release would come even if you did. I went ahead and asked. How stupid was that? Once I’d asked, I knew I’d doomed myself. There was no way my body or my mind were going to let me come without your okay. I kicked, I bit through my lip stifling my groans, I was drenched in sweat. You weren’t there. I couldn’t go on but I likewise couldn’t pull my hand away from your clit.
I was aroused by thinking of you dominating me, owning me, and without that permission, I couldn’t. Or my body wouldn’t? Or my mind wouldn’t? I don’t know all I know was I just kept going up to the edge, and the thought of your displeasure would pull me back, no not your displeasure- more knowing that I was denying you the pleasure of having me come for you, being able to take me up to that edge and hold over me that control, that ownership. It’s your cunt, your clit. How dare I try to take that away from you. I couldn’t do that. I had to wait but each minute I became more and more incoherent. More desperate.
I wanted you to just say yes. Three little letters. I wanted to hear it. I wanted whatever I did to be yours. By your hand and of your will. Still the pleasure swelled as my clit got more sore. I can only beg for your mercy. As time creeps by and my body wants to betray you, I tell myself, if you’re not there by half past, then surely you won’t mind. You’d understand. You’d let me. I shake my head. I know better. Had I just done it. It would have been fine. But I asked. The minute I did that, it was in your hands and not mine. I was whimpering out my pleas. I so wanted to give my denial and my orgasm to you. To show how much I am your dirty little slut, how I was such a low little cunt that I couldn’t even come without your say so - and yet, I was so greedy, so hungry, I couldn’t take my fingers away.
I begged over and over again. I just wanted to be filled up, to have a big thick cock pumping into my pussy, taking it, using it, pumping in and out, deeper, harder and faster, until my thoughts just disappeared out of my head. To have that cock taken out as I scream for it to go back in. To have that cock shoved between my lips as another of your holes is filled, licking clean my own juices. I clamp down with my throat and lash around your cock with my tongue. Sucking in deeper. Wanting it deeper. Wanting it everywhere. Anywhere. I am yours to fill as you see fit. Just throwing me around. Filling one hole after another. I couldn’t tell you what you used or how long it went on. I just wanted you to use me.
I’m on the verge of giving in. It feels so good and I can feel my cunt clamping down on my fingers wanting more. I have to come. One more minute. I can’t take one more minute. Please. I am so desperate. I’m going to break apart when three little words appear on my screen. Come for me. The sweetest words. Wave after wave is torn out of mw, wrenched from your over stimulated cunt. Bucking off of the mattress. Gritting my teeth trying not to scream. Liquid pours out of me. My head is spinning and yet. And yet I’m a greedy little cunt and a hungry dirty whore and I want more.
I should be content. I know I should but I’m not. If I ask, either you’ll say yes and I will feel even more release as my body is given over to you. Or. You’ll say no and I will have to live with this torment. This need. A hunger burning with the constant throb of my clit at this point. I have to try as I still can’t seem to drag my fingers away. Again. Please. You respond. I know I’m such a hungry little cunt and often insatiable- always wanting more, but hopefully that serves you well. Maybe I can live up to all that you want me to take. Maybe I have the endurance. The ability to keep giving you what you want. I want to please you. I want to serve you. I want to see just what I can take. I grab a pillow and put it on top of my face as I can’t keep the sound from escaping as another orgasm comes ripping through me. Unbinding me and my whole body starts to shake. My head falls back. I just want to rest in that feeling. That bubble. I am nothing. I am Yours.