She Plucked my Eyebrows

Imagine the early 2000s. Low-rise jeans, whale tails, and sperm eyebrows. I was only eight years old and was being watched at a friend's house while my parents were-- well, I don't know, somewhere away from me.

My friend's older sister was in her 20s and decided my eyebrows were too bushy. Too big for my tiny, little eight-year-old face. So, you know what that bitch did? She plucked my eyebrows. Thankfully she did not deem me a good candidate for the sperm brow. But, she changed my appearance enough that even my dad noticed. "What happened to your face!?" he asked when I arrived home. Well, while I was out an unhinged young adult unleashed a pair of tweezer on me.

I guess she did fine. I've been plucking my eyebrows in the same shape decided on by my friend's twenty-something-year-old sister for the past twenty one years.