Call it whatever you want
I want to be real right now. Past all of the jaded anger, and fear and insecurity hidden with lackluster attempts at comedy, I hate that "hope" and "peace" has become synonymous with "naive" and "absurd". I hate that we live in a world so torn apart by beliefs and ideology that we have turned ourselves against ourselves.
We have created walls and barriers to stifle and oppress ourselves, both literally and metaphorically. I hate that we blame and we fight and most of these things that we inflict on ourselves, like just another person who has cut through their own flesh in a vain attempt to free themselves from it all, are not worth the seas of blood we shed for them.
And I hate that these words and beliefs that I recite now have become so easy to ignore. So easy, because we all know them by heart. And yet, we do nothing.
We find reasons not to do what we can, and should. We find excuses, clumsy and cumbersome even to us, as to why we should continue to hate, and cheat, and kill. For what? Are we worth the air that we breathe, because I find myself wondering lately.
I hate that these words mean nothing to a people who has lost their ability to think and reason for themselves. But most of all I hate myself.
I hate myself for not being able to let go of the constant torture that is hope, even now.
That's all I've fucking got.