Listen Up, Genie
Walking on a secluded beach one day,
Seeking inner peace and an outer tan.
I noticed a brilliant glint of sunshine,
Reflecting off an object in the sand.
I bent down to see a distressed lamp
With a strange, ornamental design.
Imagining I was Aladdin,
I began rubbing it to a shine.
I relentlessly buffed.
And much to my surprise,
A bizarre mist appeared,
Swirling before my eyes.
The gaseous cloud morphed into
A legless, floating effigy.
It spoke to me in a low voice,
"I now grant three wishes to thee."
I was shocked and stunned
By this gracious ghost,
This is my big chance.
I best make the most.
"Hurry now, time is fleeting,"
Genie said with a faint plea.
"Since I am old, worn out and
My hearing is leaving me."
Speak up, I reminded myself,
And rapidly, no time to stall.
This ailing vision may expire
And with it will go my windfall.
Think, think of what you want the most.
Don’t choke or crumble. Make it known.
Pick three objects, name them right now.
Things you do not already own.
I was nervous, panicky,
Anxious and filled with much dread.
The pressure sent many thoughts
Racing through my spinning head.
Genie started vanishing,
Dissipating in the breeze.
I had to say something now,
I had to state my three pleas.
Starting with the first thought that came to my mind,
"I wish for, ah, perfect fame," I said with clout.
And followed that up with the most obvious.
"I wish for gold and money," I shouted out.
Now don't start getting greedy,
Don't ask for a magic wand.
Oh no, I’m drawing a blank.
Should I just request a blonde?
"And lastly," I conclude,
"I want, I’ll stick with um..."
Then there was a bright flash,
My whole body went numb.
Genie was gone from my world
Leaving objects at my feet.
It soon became apparent.
I needed to take a seat.
The first item was a picture frame.
The next a jar of golden honey.
The third was a stick of chewing gum.
These results were not very funny.
Then I accepted,
Much to my chagrin,
These were my wishes.
I had been done in.
For these are not things I wanted.
They’re not due to some deception.
Alas, they were the result of
Poor auditory reception.
My genie with compromised ears
Did not understand the order.
There was a misunderstanding.
The result: My abject horror.
The three pedestrian trinkets,
Gave little monetary gain.
I did not emerge much richer,
Just feeling the regretful pain.
But I will learn from this encounter.
I shall not harbor a lot of hate.
For I was taught a priceless lesson.
And that’s to always enunciate.