currently

she smokes and i don't. she's depressed and said she didn't ask me to cook. i think i'll be unhappier with blonde hair. she hasn't talked to me in two days i don't know if i'm supposed to feel slighted or if that makes me clingy and young. my ex used to hang out and talk to the girl i wasn't supposed to worry about in the intermittent. i always worry when we're not together. i don't want to be unhealed. i'm worried i'm unhealed. "shinpaisinai," i write" "nanimoshiteimsau." i watch her twitter and spotify and i see how she talks to me after she talks in group chats. but i make time for her. i make time for her, or tell her i have no wifi, and she won't tell me anything. i'm worried she's going to break up with me. this is stupid, ofc she's not. i'm worried she's in love with someone else. i'm worried she doesn't want to talk to me. i'm worried and it's dumb. i think i just don't feel like a priority, because i'll go to the bathroom to talk to her, and i think about her all the time, and it feels like she doesn't.