“you love everything,” Apathy told me once

as we languished under the sun’s watchful eye,

and Hate nodded its head in agreement.

well I can’t help it, I was born

cursed with the longing to touch and be touched,

a longing that connects me to my ancestors

and all the previous lovers of the world;

History calls me at night to tell me

I’m not the only one who has gone through

the sorrow of wanting to be merged fully with someone

only to find that you, tragically, remain just as whole.

if you’d cared enough to get your hands dirty and

open me up,

you would have found

that there is a softness in my chest

always threatening to implode.

I feel love inside me like an infected wound

and I know it’s going to kill me before it could save me.

I surrender. Logic says it’s suicide—that friend of mine

has always been too blunt—but anyway,

I have grown weary of carefulness.

I am sick to death of being reasonable,

so let me love anyway.

let it fester.

#love #tenderness #poetry #poem #sapphic

© 2019 maria somera

this is not my body,

but yet i have never felt better.

can i finally find peace within

the constictive mind of mine,

that constantly disturbs my sanity,

and draws attention to the parts of me

that i wish were unseen? that i wish were never there to begin?

i look in the mirror-

first time in a long time-

and i grin.

no more fat

on my chest

weighing me down, mentally, physically.

no more empty space between my legs,

i am truly at my greatest form!

this is who i was meant to be all along!

is this what i have been searching for forever?

have my problems just decreased entirely?

oh, dear,

i hope this lasts forever.

i love myself!

no longer does my mind play tricks on me,

no longer does my body stick out in strange places,

i am a male,

i am a man,

i am...

the same, but better.

goodbye, dysphoria!

goodbye!

this is who i am, who i was, and forever shall be!