I wonder if you realize you can't take a compliment to save your life and you hold far greater treasures in the craters of your heart than you are willing to admit.

I know the first person that will finally break down the wall of doubts you keep yourself in,deserves a trophy.

I didn't believe in the Midas touch until I met you and I see all these people who love you and who you've turned gold.

And I wonder if you are aware your mother should teach a class on how to raise a boy and we'd all be better off

And I hope you never have to bleed.

And I hope you never have to break again.

I hope everyone who meets you takes advantage of how special that is.

And I want to ask them if they notice you were meant to shine.

I hope you ignore your conscience sometimes and dive head first into the first impulsive idea you have because you were meant to live like Charlie and conquer like Bruce.

Remember when you said I was pretty?

I tried to tell you I was a monster with jealousy & anger issues

But you laughed

But I meant it

You were always good at laughing.

Remember when you said you loved me and begged me to give you a chance because you had a dream we got married

But I don't believe in marriage.

But you were always good at ignoring the things I said.

Remember when I called you in the early hours of the morning interrupting your sleep but you’d answer anyway

And you'd put on your socks and got your keys to make sure I was okay but I never was.

You were always good at jokes and bad at saying no to me.

Remember you dated that girl for a year and a half?

Our friendship was diluted into once upon every three months, with a hello and a witty comment but I could never say anything witty back

But you were always good at small talk

Remember when I kissed you out of curiousity instead of feelings and you were so happy it scared me and I ignored your texts for a week

But you were always good at forgiveness

Remember when we didn’t talk all summer and you showed up to my house and you had too much alcohol, so you passed out and hit your head

The ambulance came and I didn't know how to stay mad at you after that

But you were always good at coming back

Remember when you finally found another girl and texted me about it and I was relieved

But I was never good at sharing

And you were always good with moving on

And I was always good at disappointment

And I can’t write but when I do it’s about you, and I still have your voicemail wishing me good luck on a job I ended up getting

I know I have our pictures stored away somewhere on my computer under a file called Don't.

Remember I told you I can't make up my mind and I never know what I want.

But you were a better person than me.

And even after all that you still can make me laugh.

And you were always better at laughing than me.

I don't know you much anymore,

but I will always be haunted by the way your eyes screamed ' help me '

but you spoke fluently in jokes.

I often wondered when your bones would collapse from the weight of your heavy heart.

Well, I've never been in love but I've seen what it's done to you.

I can't help but notice your smile is weak but maybe it's just me because everyone else thinks your happy.

I wish I could wrap you up in band aids and remind you that alcohol only heals the outside cuts not the ones inside.

I watched you as you threw yourself into girls who looked at your face but never your heart,

girls who wanted to fix you but you didn't understand that you were still broken.

I wonder if you still make jokes so everyone is laughing too much to notice.

I still think about you.

And I still think about running away.

And I still hear your voice every time I come close.

You warned me that no matter how far I run, I can never lose my demons because you've already tried to drown yours.

And I believe you, I was there.