My hand clutching his face,

Drops of water falling on his eyelids.

Smoke strangling the dry air.

His heart no longer beating.

His chest no longer lifting slowly,

As sleep overtook his being.

My hands no longer shook

And my heart no longer raced.

He is gone.

And I am here.

Forced to live with myself.

Stuck to drown in my thoughts of guilt.

Dust clung to our skin.

Outlining the stains of tears on my face.

Curse this house.

Curse this feeling of pain.

Why does love exist?

Distracting us from what we really need to do.

Stabbing us in the back and laughing at our foolishness for falling for it.

Why did love have to take him away?

Why did fate have to bring him in my life, and curse him to be taken early?

I brought him here,

And it is my fault he has been taken away.

My poor baby boy, you were only three.

The howling of the wind made her jump. Her large brown eyes searching, glistening with trauma. I wish I could go back to the boring lectures. I never understood her though. Even the smallest tapping of a pencil made her frightened.

She would yell "Stop that!" At the kid who, bored of her lecture would, tap his pencil to a silly beat he created in his head. Of course, this being middle school, the other kids would catch on to her little 'pet peeve' and tap their pencils to make her angry. What they didn't know is that, it wasn't a pet peeve. It was trauma. A fear. Anxiety. She would never tell us though. She never did.

I wish I would have known what happened to her before they came. I wish I found out the pain that she suffered in her past.

That day the wind never stopped, and she never taught. Of course the students thought it was great. They didn't have to do anything but play on their phones the whole class period as the teacher cowered in the corner a small screech coming out of her mouth each time the wind blew harder. You could hear her sobs, and pleas for forgiveness. Everyone thought it was funny until it happened.

"Students, and teachers... this is a loc-AHHHHH." The intercom stopped then. Fuzz taking over the school. I felt the blood drain from my face. What... what was that?

The other kids seemed to be nervous as well but played it off as a joke.

"Ha, the principle is trying to scare us again." I could detect a slight tremor in his voice.

"I don't think so guys. He didn't even turn off the intercom, and do you remember what he was saying before? It was a lock down." I tried to reason with the other kids. Their eyes went wide, and the room silent. Even the teacher was quiet. Then, a girl gasped, and everyone started to panic.

"Everyone calm down! Freaking out is not going to solve anything." The room went silent, and that's when you could hear it. Hissing like a snake, and rattling. The lights flickered off. My breath caught in my throat. My heart pounding.

"Wha-what is that?" I looked over to the door. Seeing only the gleam of the exit sign. A shadow over took it. You could hear slow dragging footsteps.

"Hide." I whispered. We all shuffled under our desks. The room was pitch black. Suddenly the sounds stopped. Everyone held their breath terrified of what could be out there. Then. Bang! Bang! The doors rattled, with every pound. A girl screamed whimpering with every pound. I tried to see things through a logical mindset, but I couldn't help but panic. I searched around the room. Everything seemed wrong. I can't focus. I closed my eyes trying to block out this moment. Come on. Wake up. This is just a dream. Come on. Come on. Wake up. Wake up. Wake up!... It was useless. Nothing worked no matter how hard I tried.... This is real. I searched the room once again. I've got to get out of here.

I heard a girl, her voice trembling "are they zombies?" She whispered. "Is it real?"

 A tickling sensation ran up my arm as I held out my hand reaching for the ledge. What was that? I glanced around nervously, the trashed cars piled up on top of each other being the only thing in sight. I took a deep breath tearing my eyes away from the junkyard. Okay, just concentrate on getting out of here. I pushed my feet off the ground ignoring the disgusting squishy sound it made, and grabbed onto the faded green cement surface. Pulling myself onto it I could help but scurry, a childish fear of someone grabbing my ankles, and pulling me off. Quickly glancing backwards I only saw the vehicles, broken windows, and all. Why am I so frightened? There is no one here. My senses on high alert I pushed my back against the graffitied wall behind me, double checking all of my surroundings, and making myself as small as possible. Calm down! You are safe. He didn’t see you leave. My heart pounded, my breath coming out in short gasps.

“Hey! What are you doing down there?” My heart leaped into my throat, and I jerked my head upward seeing nothing. “You look frightened. Are you okay?” My eyes widened in terror, as I glanced around for the source of the voice. A soft, gentle hand was placed lightly on my left shoulder. I felt the blood drain from my face. I looked to my left seeing nothing. A scream built up in my throat, but no sound came out. I thrashed out at the area of the presence only feeling the pressure of air. The pounding of my heart was the only thing I could hear. “No need to be frightened.” the hands grip tightened, but her voice was calming.

“Get away from me!” I screamed, kicking, my grip loosened, the sky was the only thing I could see. My stomach lurched. I fell.

“Zeruiah, you need to get up!” I pushed up from my bed, black spots swarming my vision. Ah, that hurts… I put my hand to my forehead trying to ward off my head ache. Sweat drenched my body, and I was breathing hard. The presence… I looked over at the door, and saw my brother standing there. My posture relaxed. He’s real… thank God. “Did you have the dream again?” He asked his voice laced with concern, his gray eyes shining with anxiety.

“.... Yeah.” I tore my eyes away from his, hating myself for making him more worried. I heard him sigh behind me, his weight making the wooden floor boards squeak as he walked over to me. I felt him lightly place his hand on my shoulder.

“We need to see someone.” My heart dropped, and I turned to stare at him opening my mouth to decline when he cut me off, “I know you don’t want to, but we need to! Zeruiah, you have been having the same nightmare for the past two years, every night. It’s getting bad enough to the point that it’s affecting your daily life!”

“But Ray-”

“That’s enough of that!” he stood taking my shoulders, “I am your guardian, and you won’t defy me….” His eyes were hard, but I saw a tiny flinch of guilt in his steady gaze. He glanced away his features softening. Looking back into my eyes, he whispered an uncertain, “Understand?”

Ray, my brother, he has never done this before. He is the most kind, empathetic person I have ever met. Yet here he is, giving me tough love. “Yeah… I do.” He gave me his one of a kind crooked smiles, as he pulled me into an awkward hug.

“You know I’m doing this for you.” he mumbled into my shoulder, “I would never make you do something that makes you uncomfortable unless it was for your own good, you know that right?” he pulled away at this looking intently into my eyes.

“Ray, I know.”

I have been burned before. It was when I was a child carelessly touching the stove while my mother cooked. I remember the feeling. An indescribable hot, stinging covering my skin. It really hurt, but that pain was nothing compared to this. My tears didn’t have time to fall from my eyes before they evaporated. Well, at least that was my theory.

The last thing I remember was Afi’s eyes glowing with the reflection of fire. A crude grin on his paper pale face. His almost black eyes glimmering with mischief. “You’re hated,” he told me gripping my shoulders, pushing me backwards. “No one is going to miss you, Kari. That’s why you’re perfect for this experiment.” I struggled to get free. Fear clutching my heart.

“Wha-what do you mean?” I stammered trying to find traction so he couldn’t bring me back any further. He laughed. His face taking on a sickening look of power.

“Oh you’ll find out soon enough. Freak.” he spit out. My back started to heat up, and sweat trickled down my spine. My grip on the ground loosened, and I knew I was going to fall.

“Please don’t do this!” I begged him starting to feel the lump in my throat. It was hard to breath, especially with the smoky smell contaminating the air. I desperately grabbed at any sort of hope. My body started to shake. “Please…” my voice cracked. My vision started to get blurry.

“You poor girl. Enjoy hell!” He pushed me to the edge letting go, a wicked smile on his face, glowing orange against his crazed eyes. I screamed out reaching for his jacket before my body started to burn, a sickening smell entering the air.

Pain is all I knew. I couldn’t hear, smell, or see. Because four of my were senses eliminated, it intensified the one that still worked, touch.

My hatred burned hotter than the flames consuming my body. He will not be forgotten.

The world went blank.

Like a shadow following your every move, the pain of my burns haunted me. My vision returned through smoky lenses. I seemed to be floating above the world. What’s going on? I lifted my hands to my face only seeing smoke. What the… am I even human? I looked at my surroundings seeing Afi covering his mouth in disgust. My rage boiled inside me. He burned me alive. I can’t believe it. What kind of human would do that? And for what? A science experiment? I raced towards him. He glanced up and screamed stumbling away.

“What is that? What did you do?” a shaking voice pierced through his screams.

“I-I don’t know!” he stammered his black eyes wide with fear. You burned me alive! I tried to scream, but nothing came out. Emptiness filled my body, and I stopped moving. What have I become? A monster? Their screams of fear faded to background noises, and eventually they were gone.

I wandered around sensing that something wasn’t right.. Afi doesn’t have fully black eyes, and his friends are too afraid to blame him. The world isn’t tinted red, and clouds aren’t black.

“There it is!” someone exclaimed. I turned abruptly seeing the villagers pointing guns at me, “Open fire!” One of them yelled gesturing to me. I flinched as the bullet tore right through me, but felt nothing. What? I glanced down at the spot where the bullet went through but saw nothing. I looked at the people that shot me, their faces blank with confusion.

“Not another one of these.” A girl emerged from the crowd, “I told you it’s the smoke figures. It’s not a human. Your mortal weapons will not harm it.” I looked at her, her short blonde hair bouncing with every step. I tried to form the words, “what do you mean?” but once again, nothing came out.

“Nina, not one of your Enenra folklore's again.”

“It’s not a folklore. Can’t you see? It’s right in front of you,” she gestured to me. The villagers left seeming to be annoyed with her theories. She stared at the floor, her blue eyes reflecting her pain. “You are in the unknown. The place where everyone goes when they have not come to peace with their death. You especially, because of your form.” She then turned and walked away disappearing on the the horizon.

Visions of my living life came to mind like blurry paintings. A girl with long black hair, left out. Snickers of classmates as they passed her. Afi pushing her into the fire, and parents that were never there. Even though I have no eyes, I still felt the tears of understanding fall from my face, and at that moment my burns disappeared. A feeling of peace entered my body. I have let go.