I wish I had a friend

Someone who would love me to the end

A person to help me when I fall down

And rescue me when I start to drown

No one knows how I feel inside

And if someone did, I wouldn’t have to die

If they knew me, they would love me, right?

That’s what I tell myself at night

When sleep alludes me and I feel hollow

And my emotions make it hard to swallow

They come and go like waves of pain

Eroding away what keeps me sane

I pound on my head so I feel something

The demons in my soul are cunning

And it’s not pain that’s hurting me

It’s a lack of feeling that makes it hard to breathe

I need someone to make me whole

To climb inside and fill the hole

As you suck at my soul

You leave me Unwhole

You vanquish my mind 

And lay waste to time

Your evil runs deep 

It keeps me from sleep

And now that you're done

I know you have won

You push into my mind 

With thoughts so unkind

GET OUT OF MY HEAD!!!

I see myself falling into a hole

Feels like I'm sliding down a fire pole

No way out but to keep going down

Until I break apart and the pieces are found

If I don't escape, my soul is yours to hold

Don't let my story remain untold

These scars upon my wrists remind me of her

Lines of pinkish flesh

Full of empty pain that still feels fresh

Funny how emotions mix

Agony and comfort

Sadness and joy

It almost makes me sick

Disfigure

Impair

Scam

Twist

Obliterate

Ruin

Torture

Don't let pain DISTORT  the BEAUTY.

Music is one of the few things in my life I truly enjoy.  It never fails me and never ceases to flow through my mind.  I listen, play, and live with music.  Recently, a friend of mine has unknowingly turned me on to jazz.  I hope to expand my knowledge with it and go where the notes take me.

A song is made.

Time passes,

The musician grows old,

But age does not bother the notes

As they transcend eternity

In Ageless Harmony.

These blue walls aren’t in my room

They’re in my head they spell my doom

They’re a sign of my depression

This is my one true confession

The world and I we’re both fake

If I don’t change I’m going to break

The world and I we’re stuck together

The world and I

Fake forever

I have got no aspirations

Leaves me filled with desperation

Don’t know what to do with my life

I’m so full of stress and strife

Can’t fill the void that’s in my soul

Nothing around me can fill the hole

There seems to be so much expected of me

At least that’s how it seems to be

Could have went to Yale or Harvard

But I jacked off I was retarded

I could be an engineer

Live the kind of life I fear

I wish my fucking life was done

Go to the bedroom grab the gun

Put it my mouth and paint the wall

Like I don’t even care at all

My Dad will come into the room

All the red will leave him blue

Sarah, you’re the one I need

I need you to rescue me

Don’t want to put this up to you

But it is and that’s the truth

But right now you’re not around

And I don’t know you anyhow

It’s better to burn out then to fade away

So here I go out with a bang!!!