My son
I know u are here Lord
Listening to me
“A mothers plea”
As I get on my knee
And pray the holy spirit covers me.
If u want, take him Lord
May he be free
Free from pain and misery
The hardest prayer I have prayed to thee
But u love him so much more than me.
Run him through dandelions, plucking each 1,2,3
To the crystallized ocean, where he was meant to be.
Swimming in the abyss of the sea.
Tell him mommy & daddy are coming to join soon
Tell him to make room in his bed full of bloom
“You’ll be very missed”
while we wait in the gloom

-Lashay Baylis
It’s 11 pm, Thursday night
Longed for him to stroll into our room.... Instead, not even a fight...
His footsteps approaching from front porch again.
With hopes up, oh sure, how vain, how vain.
He was walking into the kitchen just to refill glass high
The addiction, we’re broken
Only, hi and bye.
Short days without him, Lonely nights alone
while desperately, I ...
Weep in our sheets waiting for my groom
Wanting to hear about his dreams, in bloom.
My eyes shut down, from our needy kids
—->I can barely even see to write this.
The tears from my heart, desperate to be touched.
Asking our 5 year old to massage my legs,
“he’s too busy” & such.
I have slaved all day just keepin’ the littles alive.
& When he gets home, it’s dinner then a dive...
Right in, to CC & La Aroma de Cuba
Hazed, and cloudy I just feel like succuba.
I don’t know where to go.
To sleep I suppose
Maybe in my dreams...
At least, that I chose ...
I’m falling again
Another blue eyed wonder
Those damn blue eyes
I’m trusting time is of the essence
To drown in them again
Those eyes
Sweeter this time
Somebody else
So I heard you found somebody else
And at first I thought it was a lie
I took all my things that make sounds
The rest I can do without
I don't want your body
But I hate to think about you with somebody else
Our love has gone cold
You're intertwining your soul with somebody else
I'm looking through you while you're looking through your phone
And then leaving with somebody else
No, I don't want your body
But I'm picturing your body with somebody else
Come on baby
This ain't the last time that I'll see your face
Come on baby
You said you'd find someone to take my place
I just don't believe that you have got it in you 'cause
We are just gonna keep 'doin' it' and everytime
I start to believe in anything you're saying
I'm reminded that I should be getting over it
I try so hard to do right and everything I do I give it my absolute all and pour my heart into everything I do. So I poured and poured for years and years until there's nothing left of me. So with nothing but bones and organs and a hallowed soul I still pour and give my all
The night is deafening when the silence is listening
And I'm down on my knees, and I know that something is missing.
Because the back of my mind is holding things I'm relying in
But I choose to ignore it because I'm always denying them
I'm a bit of a manic when it's not as I plan it
'Cause I start losing my head, then I get up in a panic
Remember when we were kids and always knew when to quit it
Are we denying a crisis or are we scared of admitting it?
I don't want to know
I just want to run to you
And break off the chains, and throw them away
I just want to be so much
And shake off the dust that turned me to rust
Sooner than later, I'll need a savior