My mind seemed fuzzy, as I danced around my room.

My soul had been dipped in blood, and a crazed grin spread across my face.

I stepped on shattered ceramic, loving the blood oozing between my toes. The pain.

I danced. Around. And around. And around.

"Like a carousel!" I screamed. "Like a freaking carousel!"

Dizzy.

Dizzy.

Dizzy.

CRAZY.

Dizzy.

Dizzy.

Dizzy.

Limbs had been town of from my victims, and they were scattered across the room, with the pieces of broken ceramic.

I picked up an arm and hugged it. I loved my victims, I loved them, I loved them, I loved them.

Dizzy.

Dizzy.

Dizzy.

Crazy.

Blood, blood, blood...

I jumped onto my bed, and stuffed my mouth with pillow. I laughed into it. I laughed so hard tears streamed from my eyes.

DIZZY CRAZY DIZZY CRAZY DIZZY DIZZY DIZZY DIZZY BLOOD

I hugged a leg. "I LOVE YOU, VICTIMS!" I screamed.

BLOOOOOD

I laughed again, and rubbed my streaming eyes with a cold finger. I jumped off my bed again, and stomped on the broken ceramic. Broken broken BroKeN cccccCRRRRaaazy #]]#}[=+#\>6/)@~;9<0.(9<{#>\=.7/0(, CRAZY

I laughed into a head.

BROKEN BROKEN CRAZY

"Hi."

"Hey."

Silence.

"I haven't seen you for a while."

"I know."

Silence.

"Where have you been?"

"Places."

"Places?"

"Places!"

Silence.

"I missed you."

"I know."

Silence.

"Did you miss me?"

"I guess."

Silence.

"Why won't you talk?"

"I don't know."

"Please, will you tell me where you've been?"

"No."

"Why?"

"I can't."

"Can't, or won't?"

"Both."

Silence.

"I'm leaving."

"Okay."

"Won't you come?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"I don't know."

"Goodbye."

Silence.

Spottedleaf was walking through the forest. It was new-leaf, and herbs were starting to sprout out of the earth.

Suddenly, Spottedleaf came across a MYSTERIOUS Twoleg den. Heck, the mouse-brained she-cat decided, how about I go check it out? When she stepped inside the den, the first thing she noticed was... A wall. It was beautiful and had roses all over it. "Oh my," Spottedleaf gasped, "that wall is absolutely LOVELY!"

"That wall can talk," the wall said. Spottedleaf just about fainted in surprise. "Great StarClan!" She excliamed. "I am so, so sorry, sir!"

The wall said, "You know, baby, I like you."

"I love you too!!" Spottedleaf gasped, and her eyes turned into hearts. Suddenly, there was a voice behind Spottedleaf and the wall. "BUT SPOTTEDBABY!" The voice wailed. "I THOUGHT YOU LOVED MEEEEE!" Firepaw was there, tears streaming down his BOOTIFUL FUR. Spottedleaf snorted. "Why love you, when the wall is so much... HOTTER?" Spottedleaf gushed.

"BUT MY NAME'S FIREPAW!" Firepaw cried.

Spottedleaf shrugged. "Me and wall have buisness to do." Firepaw ran out crying. Spottedleaf turned back to the wall. "Baby, I never caught your name."

"The name's MISTER WALL MC WALLIE PANTS," MISTER WALL MC WALLIE PANTS said.

"Well, then," Spottedleaf mewed. "I love ya." Then Spottedleaf and MISTER WALL MC WALLIE PANTS had a make out session and the result was Spottedleaf's Herbalicious lipstick all over the wall.

When Spottedleaf got back to camp, she couldn't concentrate. She was so in love with MISTER WALL MC WALLIE PANTS that she acidentally fed Pawpaw deathberries. Wonder why you never met Pawpaw? That's why.

The next night, Spottedleaf met MISTER WALL MC WALLIE PANTS again.

The next morning, Spottedleaf realized she was expecting kits with him. She was overjoyed.

Many moons later, she had her kits. They were basically kittens with blocky bodies and random roses all over their fur.

DA HOLLYLEAF BEFORE SHE WAS BORNED came down from GONNABEBORNINTHEFUTURECLAN and gave Spottedleaf a lecture about how it was against the warrior code and medicine cat code to have kits with a wall.

Spottedleaf stuck her tongue out at DA HOLLYLEAF BEFORE SHE WAS BORNED and told her that her kits' names were Wallkit, Rosekit, MISTERWALLMCWALLIEPANTSKIT, and Normalkit.

Then Firepaw came in and ate Normalkit and Rosekit out of jealousy.

DA HOLLYLEAF BEFORE SHE WAS BORNED screamed at him about breaking the warrior code.

Firepaw made spitting sounds at DA HOLLYLEAF BEFORE SHE WAS BORNED.

The next night, Spottedleaf visited MISTER WALL MC WALLIE PANTS again and told him the nexts of his kits.

"OH MAH GAWD WE HAVE LITTLE WALLIES!" MISTER WALL MC WALLIE PANTS sobbed. "I LOVE EM SO MUCH!" MISTER WALL MC WALLIE PANTS embraced them in a hug. How walls can hug, IDK.

Then the wall had some very sad news. "I shall have to leave you, Spottedhoneypoopoo," he said. "I have to go make out with my udder boyfriend--FIREPAW!"

"I THOUGHT YOU LOVED MEEE, MISTER WALL MC WALLIE PANTS!" She sobbed. "AND I THOUGHT YOU WERE A BOOOY!" "I'M MULTI GENDER!" The wall screamed, and started kissing Firepaw.

Firepaw smirked at Spottedleaf between kisses.

Spottedleaf was so upset that she begged Clawface to kill her. Thus the story of how Spottedleaf died. (Although, in StarClan, she found a very handsome wall... With lilacs on him. Hint hint.)

He makes me feel

Like a lightweight

He forced his way

Into my thoughts

And refuses to leave

But I don't always mind that

But then I come back, yet again

To the fact that

I don't have the confidence

To talk to him

And I don't feel

Good enough

To do so

And that makes me angry

At myself

But then I see him again

And he forces his way into my thoughts again

And the cycle begins again

I'm afraid we have to travel back in time for this one. The thing is this particular event took place sometime in the mid 1950's, but when exactly I can't say.

I know that I was very little at the time, maybe even about two years old so that would make it sometime in 1954-55.

But it happened, and it left a mark on me that I'll take to my grave.

I was sat on the floor at home, and Mom and Dad were arguing about something, but the arguing turned to shouting, and the shouting turned to fighting, and swearing, and blood. Shortly after the fighting a neighbour entered the room and stopped it, by which time I was just frozen in fear.

I was terrified as I'd never seen violence before, and I'll never get over it.

Parents have no idea how much their behaviour affects their children. Sadly.

My life is fragmenting and falling apart,

The joy that I once felt has gone from my heart,

I feel like I'm caught in a spiral of gloom,

That's keeping me trapped in this godawful room,

My friends and acquaintances drift along by,

They wave as they go as I sit here and sigh,

Another full day and another dark night,

I'm trapped and I'm screaming with no end in sight,

My only escape are the words on this page,

As they hold the key to escape from this cage,

But what to do next I regret I know not,

Save sit and await for that fatal slip knot,

So please shine your light and come show me the way,

I just need a lift so I don't go astray,

This road is so hard and I so need a friend,

And if I don't fine one I fear it's the end.

Down at the bottom of the sea I sit,

Fish swimming in and out of me.

Sinking deeper into this sandy pit,

Nothing here is ever lit.

And although I'm slowly losing wit,

I can say I'm not a hypocrite.

Did you know...

Spiders aren't particularly talented swimmers.

Camels leap twenty five feet into the air when they sense danger.

The fearsome dinosaurs known as Tyrannosaurus Rex were born with a natural instinct for piano playing.

Pet goldfish swim peacefully around their tanks, but when you're not looking they pull faces at you.

All Giraffes put on lipstick when the moon is full.

Gerbils are keen vocalists.

Taken from the Not Particularly Accurate Book of Facts by Yowwa.