Adoration
Dark as the bags
Beneath his tired eyes.
Burdens as heavy
As his deep muffled sighs.
Repent! Repent!
But still-
He feels the same.
If only he knew
He is not the one to blame.
Slaving away
Day after day
Numbing his pain
To keep the demons at bay
If only he knew
He is stuck in the game.
Check after check-
Diagnosis? You’re just insane.
As the grass grows,
Money flows as
Money goes.
Slow down,
My dear friend.
As He said-
For this is just the beginning,
Not the end.
-Kelly Wiman
“Just a thing”
Where do you place,
What doesn't belong?
Those things you can't just get rid of,
They've been yours for too long.
Do you brush them like dust,
In the cracks of your floor?
Do you pretend they're not there-
Turn away,
Shut the door?
Or do you move them around-
Until you find the right place.
Twist and mend,
"Just pretend"
All to save a little face.
Do you lie awake at night?
As you’ve realized what you’ve lost?
Vaporizing memories
As that fire turns
To frost.
The problem with things,
Things that just don't belong-
Is the perspective you've had,
And ignored all along.
What's a song that rejects,
What it’s really meant to do?
Speak your heart,
Your desires-
Things most important-
Just to you.
If you find a missing piece
That doesn't seem to belong,
The problem, don't you see?
Has been you,
All along.
Because a world
That can't fit,
What doesn't “belong”.
Is no life of your own,
It never was all along.
The thing about things-
That just don't belong.
They appear,
Just in time
Reminding,
Prescribing.
We
Are what's wrong.
-Kelly Wiman
Double Edged Sword
These hands
Do not hold
A heart
A friend
Not even a speck of gold.
These fingers do not trace
The distance between
You and I.
They do, however
Hold the knife
Of which you die.
A poet and an artist
Born to bleed and talk it through.
But the trophy I hold highest
Is the pain I write of you.
-KellyWiman
Star Dust
In another world,
A dimension near or far.
I once began as whole-
A shining, blissful star.
As gravity gave out
And gave life to shooting stars-
I watched in awe and dreamed one day,
Of a world not mine-
but Ours.
And then there was you
Radiating from afar
An aura of a different hue.
Inspiration,
(or so they say)
Pulled me in
Drew me closer-
Lit a fire
Burned through night-
And created day.
I crashed, headfirst-
And straight into you.
Then everything dark
turned brilliantly blue
Explosions and chaos
Consumed the sky.
Anything living here
Most certainly would die.
I grinned at the thought.
For it would be
Just me and you.
Bound together,
Forever.
Now I’m haunted
Because I remember.
-Kelly Wiman
Unwell
I wonder who I might be
If I followed my heart
If I let me be me.
Would the sky fall in
And drink me dry
Would my words ignite a fire
Or would they burn me till I die
Do I ache of whats inside me
Or is it someone else I fear?
That is-
To be forgotten
Small
An empty shell
Is heaven really
close at all
Or am I really
Just unwell.
3:33
Leaves spill
In crowds of three
Am I waiting for them
Or are they waiting for me
Crowds fall
In shades of grey
Am I blind
Just a fool
Or does this vary
Day to day
My heart
Burning there
Split straight into two.
Half of it is his
The other
Remains with you.
Am I scared of what’s inside me?
Or is what’s out’s outside I fear?
Crickets
Soft hums
Slowly bang
Electric drums
Sadly, that noise
Sheepishly dissolved
I’m left in my own head now
With these feelings unresolved.
Closed Gate
Trees curl around me
Beads of light escaping through
A road diverges slowly,
Neither one including you.
I walk blindly
between the two
Yet there you are
On guard.
Ashamed,
I can’t pass through.
The gravel is burning
beneath my tired feet
I must move faster
Change direction!
Instead I take a seat.
Flesh and bone
Burning on stone
Everyone’s watching.
But still,
I burn alone.
Put me on the stake
Let me prove I’m not a fake
I was always searching
I thought I might always be.
From the ashes,
I dug down deep.
Little did I know..
I hold the fucking key.
-Kelly Wiman
Metamorphosis
All that noise,
All those screams.
She lived over,
and over.
In reality-
In her dreams.
They echoed
And bounced
From wall
To wall.
Splashing harder-
Pushing further,
And lower she would fall.
As the waves ripped and curled
Around her weakened stance,
She found power-
In this rhythm,
Embraced the rain,
And chose to dance.
She moved with grace,
Blind faith-
And embraced each passing storm.
A forcefield formed around her,
A cocoon to keep her warm.
And in the end
She found this weather
Was the greatest gift of all.
Once weighed down
Now with wings
She will fly
Instead of fall.
-Kelly Wiman
Father.
I’ve walked
This bridge
So many times
With so many thoughts
I could make them all rhyme.
Yet not once have I felt
This might be the last time.
I always talk
About reality and dreams
How something actually is
Or how something just seems.
They say pain and gain
Or go insane
It’s not “in my head”
It’s engraved in my brain.
Did I wait too long to let him go
Was it his time?
Or am I the one to blame?
I’m so sick and tired
Of being so wired
Now I’m chasing the high
Because I can’t believe I let him die.
I know I’m not coping
I’m just desperately hoping.
He’ll reappear
And not just disappear
His voice is all I hear
I just want him here.
-Kelly Wiman
Martin Julian Wiman
1/16/1954-3/12/23
Maze Runner
Minutes became hours-
Hours became days.
Here I am,
An open field-
Lost in my own maze.
I built these walls
With my own bare hands
As you forged a path
With stone that barely stands.
Finally, I open my eyes
Just to sit and stare.
As now I am only a part
Of what once was a pair.
I can only remember
Where we began-
A shot was fired
So I ran
And I ran.
Must have held you
Close beside me
With my tightest grip.
I went too far ahead-
So we both fell hard
and tripped.
Tied to bits and pieces
Of the little that we shared
I left a trail
For you to follow
“He never knew”
I’ll tell myself,
But really-
he never cared.
-Kelly Wiman