Hmmmm, ask to be the security for the bank, and then rob the bank with that gun... I mean use your fake ID to sign up for the job, yeah?

Note: Use disguises and make sure you use gloves, and have a good getaway plan.

But also work at the bank for a while so you can plan the robbery properly

Yes, ta-da I'm an evil mastermind, am I not?

You establish a need for the bank

Appoint a board of directors, preferably wealthy business owners to put up the starting capital

You continue to follow the steps to establishing and running a bank

Then when everyone is convinced that you are really good at running the bank, you take advantage of their ignorance

You take so much money every so often until you have enough to start a new bank

You keep doing this until you have a steady income coming from running these banks and the income that you earn by stealing so much money every so often

The real question is, how do I get in and out without the security alarms going off. Many people have tried and failed, I won’t be one. My plan? Make it an inside job, I am here at the bank ready to open the vault for some of the most famous detectives, apparently the vault was robbed last week, a great cover up... Until the detectives don’t show up, but I still have Plan-B.

I will wait until I’m the last person at the bank, then carefully turn off security and lights, then open the vault, lock myself in the vault, and then it’s up to my accomplices to drill through the roof and help me lug the loot through the hole, me first and loot later. When I get through the hole my partners have a helicopter waiting to take us to a remote area where we will split the loot.

After splitting the loot we will all take to our own paths. If one of us gets caught, so be it, but I will be the unfound one. My part of the loot will be hidden so well not even the best will have the evidence to bring me in.

I will be The Unfound Robber of the 21st Century!

I know the perfect crime.

I know how to get the money without leaving a trace.

No witnesses, no victims, but a lot of dough!

It's elegant and quite simple when I think about it.

But telling you would bring a risky variable to the plan.

So I won't risk it. That would be stupid.

And I'm not.

First, the bank I'm robbing has to be near a sewer. Next, I'll need a ski mask, a dufflebag, a wig, and some clay that matches my skin tone. Before this heist even starts, I'll dye and cut my hair then sneak in through the bank's bathroom window, with gloves on, and hide my weapons, mask, and change of clothes (probably in a floorboard or base board). Later, I will go in through the front doors, with the clay on my defining features. I will casually walk to the bathroom and get my things, being careful not to leave any fingerprints. Once I'm changed and prepared, a simple armed robbery will do. (Everyone down, put the money in the bag, blah blah blah.) Then, with the money in tow, I'll escape out the bathroom window and into the sewers. While in the sewers, I'll put the wig on and take off the clay. I'll emerge in a back alleyway and spend a couple weeks at a distant friend's house. Boom, bank robbed.