if I was to say
I want this
there is ‘this’
will you leave
to let me read those lines
between the script?
etched by touch
to flesh your bones
I know to
rest my eyes
would close that book
but for now
you are contours and curves
angles and ridges
I reach to
or longing to define
if I see you
in half light
will you move
or blind me
I seek myself
though not at depth
just a surface touch
to prove that I'm real
I see myself in you.
I must have felt my own face before,
The contours and dents of my nose, my chin,
Touched each of my eyebrows,
But never did imagine
A specimen so beautiful
Could remotely resemble what my hands have felt.
I want to reach forward to you, too
I wonder if your skin is just as soft
You look so lonely,
You are just as frozen as me,
Eyes locked onto mine.
I cannot help but be intimidated by you;
In this empty world, you are all I have left.
I read in books that there was a time
There was more of us:
Can you talk? Will you answer if I ask
If there are others?
You must be a different species entirely.
I reach forward
To touch you
And your arm moves, too, towards mine
My heart, beating audibly
My hand, stretching farther
And touching nothing but the silvery surface
Of a mirror.
You were so beautiful
Running, getting tired.
Slowing down to rest, hands on knees. Head down.
Catching my breath, heart rate returning to normal.
Sitting down, stretching my legs, my arms, eyes closed.
Back to normal.
Standing up and turning around...
Heart racing, flush in the face.
Head back down and walking.
Hands sweaty, self-conscious.
facing a being to be described as none other than
When the door opened to the blind date
I didn't hear the crash of lightening
let alone the flash of light that blinded me...
I have no idea how I ended up on the ground
let alone how my feet were back on their own,
before I could get my jaw off of the floor...
When I focused, all I could remember was a smile
and that gentle voice of yours
The first thing I noticed were her eyes. Big black, solid with no pupils. I wondered how she could see. Sensing she had compassion and curiosity I knew she meant no hostility. I don't know how I could understand her meaning, her eyes were so different.
She came with a purpose. I felt honored her people chose me to investigate. There are so many of us. Gladly I participated in the interest of humans. I have no scary abduction story to tell, but you should know I met an alien.
Telepathically we spoke. It was easy and natural although it is not done here.
My every thought (what do they eat? why do they move methodically?) was interpreted and documented. My demeanor was recorded.
To this day they inform me of future events like chemical warfare and their intentional destruction of parts of the earth.
I was not permitted to touch them. They left suddenly after suppressing my memories but I still have enough of them to tell you this.
The female of any species is to be honored and respected. After my interaction with them (I was a child) I wanted to be a boy and just pee on shit. I didn't want to be female. The aliens showed me the responsibility of females. It was so unlike the males.
So there you go. My best description of something totally foreign.
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I heard it first. Faint and constant. Growing louder with each laboured step I took. It seemed as though this noise was inside my own head.
A cooling breeze blew in leaving little moist droplets resting on my skin.
A fresh, soothing scent washed away the musky air.
The murmur was now a roar.
My parched tongue and throat were relieved by the mist, making it easier to swallow.
My Heart was thumping in my chest, competing with the now pounding, crashing clamouring near by.
Wisps of hair danced around my face and tiny bumps appeared on my arms.
Suddenly it appeared, looming over. Stretching into the blinding light. Spitting forth with each eruption. Offering rations of it's bounty amid warnings of it's fury.
I remember my birth.
I know it's not possible, but it is true.
All I had known was me. My universe was small, but it was all I knew, so it was huge. I had no needs. I knew no wants. Then that all changed.
I knew no language, so the memory is only one of sensations. Comparisons in my mind of what was and then was no more.
I don't remember the pain, just the absence of comfort.
I did not understand why my eyes needed to close to protect them selves. There had never been brightness before.
I felt so heavy, for I no longer floated.
My warmth was no more.
Sound was not new to me but now it was intense.
This was my first view of my new universe. Everything was new and foreign. Everything was bright, loud and cold.
I now knew to want. I wanted my comfort back.
The sun rises, revealing a timeline of the earth.
In the morning it’s gray, white, yellow, orange;
first cool, then warm, then unbearable.
I walk to the edge and stop abruptly to meet
a sudden drop into oblivion, and across the way
walls climb to meet a horizon that stretches for miles.
I can breathe, move again as the afternoon
turns to evening and the chill of night greets me,
and it’s red, ochre, vermillion, then purple.
The moon rises, lighting the expanse below,
and at the very bottom I see a river that moves
through this obscure reverse mountain.
I could stay lost in its immensity searching for
its beginning and its end, but instead I retreat from the edge
and leave it as it is, mysterious, fierce, humbling, grand.
“The Edge of the Universe” Yours and Mine
my mind goes in circles
is there an edge?
then where does it stop?
you look to the edge
there is no edge,
a half circle,
glance back to the edge,
a half circle,
why can't you grasp there is no end?
a half circle,