Nightmares and other disasters

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Everything is so vivid and intense. The colors are so bright... almost blinding. Every emotion heightened. Each feeling magnified, especially the fear… and the pain. Yes, nightmares have a tendency to do that to you. Even though somehow, I know I’m dreaming - I can’t seem to fully realize it. It’s almost like watching a movie and being in it. I no longer control the situation… and worst off all, I am alone. No one to help me, no one to rescue the foolish human from her fate.

Everything that happened to me in real life… all that pain, all the horror… seems to repeat its self in my personal nightmare. I feel the spear ripping through my body, tearing me apart… piece by piece. My skin, my muscle’s… my flash. Blood streaming down the floor of the caves, soaking in to the soil, in to the rocks, that had been there from the very beginning… from the dawn of time.

But this time, it’s deferent. It’s just one monster. And it’s not the one I want to see. This monster truly hates me. I’m the interference… I’m the problem, the obstacle he needs to destroy. I don’t really know why he hates me so much… I’m so easy to defeat, I’m nothing. And yet, he treats me like his greatest enemy. Pure evil… or pure good, if you prefer… if it makes more sense.

And there’s nothing I can do to stop him. He can do anything to me… and boy, does he use it. I feel like a training bag. Punch left… punch right… pierce right through the center… whatever you please… I won’t object… How can I? And the pain? It’s nothing like I had experienced before. I thought that I reached my limits before, in real life. I was wrong. This pain is incomparable. I feel like I’m being shredded, torn in to these little pieces. How is it that I can stand right now, is the biggest mystery of my life.

And he doesn’t just push the spear once, he keeps doing it… again, and again… and all over from the beginning. Through my side, through my stomach... through my ribs… I can hear the tearing sound’s… the bones crushing, my limbs falling apart. And finally I fall to ground. I can no longer stand on my own. I’m just like a ragged doll. But my defeat doesn’t stop him. It makes him even more aggressive. Like he wanted to play a bit longer with me. There is no stopping him now - there never was really. I was doomed from the moment I took my first breath, and now I was going to take my last, it’s over.

I wake up with panic. Cold sweat running down my body, down my spine. The covers soaked with my fear. The darkness around me, only magnifying the sheer terror. For a moment everything is still. The only sound in the caves, are my tears falling to the ground. My eyes wander around, not really registering anything. My mind still caught up in the never ending nightmare. The only thing that brakes through, is a silhouette calmly standing by a chair and not moving… something snaps inside of me.             

The waterfall of emotions floods me with an intensity that could destroy the Universe.

I feel arms wrapping around my back. Instantly a loud scream escapes my lungs. It’s so loud I can almost hear it shattering pieces of rocks around me. This hold is strong, like steel, I can feel it mangling my body. I try to break free, but the strong arms wrapped around my body are ruthless.

The screaming raves on, until my voice becomes too hoarse for me to continue. I still try to escape the danger that is crushing me, but once again this is a battle I’m sure to lose. The defeat weakens me, all of my strength lost.

You’re alright... – a voice whispers to my ear, and an uncontrolled shiver runs down my spine.

I don’t response. My reactions slower than usual. And then a thought hits me. The arms around me weren’t really hurting me, these arms were just restraining me from myself. Protecting me from the madness that took over me, making me desperate and uncontrolled.

Only a nightmare... – the voice says, after another long pause from my side.

I try to control my breathing. Working very hard on slowing down my pulse, on stopping my heart from exploding. It’s not an easy task, but eventually everything slows down. My mind starts to process the information. The more the time passes, the more I realize I overreacted - again. This dream that attacked my mind, while I was asleep… put everything out of proportion. Though after a nightmare like that, you honestly can’t blame me for being jumpy and freaked out by the situation, and I acted like a lunatic.

I mean, I saw him standing next to me, calm and reserved. 

Why would he attack me, and try to hurt me?                                                            

What would be a point of such an exercise?

Exactly, none. But I wasn’t thinking straight. All those awful images that filled my mind, terrifying me senseless. Was it not enough that I was constantly (almost) dying these days? That on every step of the way, somebody was trying to kill me. Just because I existed? Yes, this was something that could scare you, and make you do crazy things. 

His touch wasn’t a threat.

It was comfort and a restrain... for the currently crazy girl in Hell.

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This is a short extract from a story I once wrote about a girl trapped in caves of Hell, with a person you would not want to ever be alone with.