I Waited

————

Because I waited I saw the rain

and wept beside my lover‘s pain.

Fading slowly, it washed away.

Is this the end we fear each day?

Skies of black, they mock my heart

laughing while I’m torn apart.

Shadows from the past I see,

his gentle hand caressing me.

Holding fast and staying strong

now it’s all so very wrong.

Gone is life the way it was.

Now I know the simple cause.

Because I waited I felt the rain

that wept for me and my lover‘s pain.

-L.B.-

————

I can‘t recall the exact circumstances surrounding this piece but I do recall this year as quite painful and I spent lots of time listening to music that spoke to me. I think some song might have been my muse.

that wept for me and my lover‘s pain.—

I Waited—

-—

I Only Want You to Know

Alone, I am without you,

just existing within my solitude.

There are many things I must do,

one, is to let you know that I am subdued.

I want only the very best to happen,

to return to you once more.

I really have no idea when,

but when I do, you will know, I am sure.

Of all the past memories,

the greatest on my mind,

before I sleep,

I think about the rushing sea.

And, like the water,

you too, are one of a kind.

I make this comparison of water and you,

because you are both so much the same,

you rush forward, stop suddenly,

and return to what you are;

a serene blue of tranquility and calm.

I ask not for much, only to say,

that given time,

our minds and bodies will grow.

For you, I will work hard in every way.

I love you.

I beg not, I ask not;

I only want you to know.

On February 7th 2018, I went to visit one of two remaining uncles for three days. In doing so, he showed me many photos of family, some of which I had never seen before. In this mix of family history, I found this poem I wrote.

Quite honestly, I don’t recall who this was written for, or even why I wrote it. Yet, as a writer, it is part of what I do and who I am. Is it one of my best? Hardly. But it goes with hundreds of other pieces that have yet to see the light of day. Because of original grammar, and spelling back then, I did clean this up (just a little).

(Two poems written at age 18)

PREGNANT MADONNA

Holy Mother of God, mother to be

I wonder if—

if the second coming of Christ is near?

In the kitchen

it's cold standing on the hard wood floor before

a sketch of Mary

with a crowned fetus cradled in her arms

help us Jesus

In the news they don't talk about it anymore

the greed to choose

My Dad's sketch clear and fragile as thin ice

drawn in pencil

on scraps of time uneaten by a cookie

factory that 

in it's inconstant infernal mercy

allows us to live

—sad manifestation of the proud world

perhaps it's happened

that the Savior at rest in a womb

has been murdered?

(Jan. 28, 1998)

This poem submitted to a poetry anthology "Rhymes of Greatness," you know the kind where they jury-in just about everybody in the hopes that the enthused aspiring poet will purchase the book so the group can recoup funds/make a profit... background in interpreting this somewhat uncharacteristic write for the time (being quite personal and in poem form): My mother's name is Mary; my sister was expecting an unexpected baby, my father was an Artist though he did not "earn-a-living" by it and was in physical pain from factory-work related injuries...

Below another poem, needing no explanation really, except to note that it was submitted to a similar anthology published by the Poetry Guild; it has some awkward grammar that I had insisted upon at the time... in both poems I have faithfully transcribed the exact texts, despite being tempted to tweak here and there...

(Feb. 12, 1998)

SEA

Ah! steady and powerful force of sea

How kindly it flows over its own;

Protecting its inhabitants gently

And this ocean, itself vast, is sewn

Of, to, many immense forms— so peacefully

That only littleness could dare dethrone!

Ne'er vicious, it follows Law gracefully.

This sea thus could, with thought and skill, be our...

That we might seize what is in our power—

Not worthless trinkets of so soil'd money—

But now rolling up our sleeves happily,

And bringing forth our dust rags, though late hour

Begin to fill our responsibility

To, with all creation, live easily

#FoundPoetryPieces #Challenge

<font face="Helvetica" size="3" color="silver">02.25.2018</font>

There is no other half

Because there is no ther you

Come back to me as I'd come back to you

I'd await you daily but you still never show

You said you loved me but then how could you just go?

When I dream it is of just you

The days and nights we should have had

But now I just sit here alone and sad

I still remember that day,

The day you turned away from me.

You said no words,

No goodbyes,

No last kiss or hugs,

You left me hanging on that thin ropes,

Hoping me to fell.

I still remember that day,

The day I cried.

You said 'wait for me',

And I did.

But you never were.

You left me behind,

Without any remorse.

I still remember that day,

The day where you text me,

I know by that times that you have changed,

But I didn't want to admit it.

I hide it from you,

Trying to be like always.

But then,

'Good night, sweet dream',

Becomes our last text.

And I still remember that day,

The day I waited for you to turn back,

But you never did.

You walked away.

Smiling...

But I'm not the one who makes you smile,

It's was her.

And always will be her...