Sharks Will Always Be Dangerous

No matter how you spin it, a thousand-pound apex predator is going to be dangerous, especially one whose mouth is filled with a steady supply of disposable teeth. So yes, technically, you might one day die from a shark attack while swimming in the ocean. On average, though, sharks only kill five people worldwide in a year. Given that the global population is currently nudging up on eight billion, the chance that you're one of those five is miniscule at best. The grand majority of shark attacks aren't because a vicious killing machine wants to grab a tasty human as a snack - in fact, most people attacked by sharks are spat back out after that first bite. The shark mistakes the person for a seal - particularly those on surfboards with their feet hanging off the end, or offering a similar silhouette from below - and, realizing its mistake, leaves in search of tastier prey. Sharks are a lot like babies in that they explore the world by putting it in their mouth, the difference being that from one a curious nibble can be fatal while from the other it leaves you somewhat sticky.

And while we're on the subject, I will repeat the refrain: sharks are dangerous. But you know what animal is responsible for far more human deaths per year? Deer. Yes, those adorable Bambis are responsible for hundreds of fatal car crashes in the U.S. alone every year. Other dangerous animals include dogs, snakes, scorpions, spiders, horses, and cows. Then there's drunk drivers, distracted drivers, airplane crashes, train derailments, lightning strikes, cancer, heart failure, falling down stairs. Oh, and all the ways to die that you really should have known better but are still statistically more likely than shark attack. These include: shaking vending machines, champagne corks, ladders, hot tap water, and hippos. So yes, sharks are dangerous. They have evolved to be dangerous. But if you take a minute to think about it rationally, you would be better off swimming in the ocean every day and never driving your car (statistically speaking). Or consider this: you are far more likely to die by falling out of bed than by shark attack. So if you make it to breakfast, there's no reason for you to worry about the sharks. Let them continue taking care of the ecosystem. Like cockroaches, sharks have been around since long before our ancestors and, if we continue to let these elegant creatures maintain ocean health, they very well might be around long after we are gone.