I'm waiting for the perfect moment. Patience plays a large role in this game of hearts. Its slow eeriness allows me to savour every second and this is a moment I want to remember. I want to see your face crack into a frown of shock. I can hardly wait to feel the pain radiate off of your trembling body or feel the power that’ll run through my veins and send a rush of accomplishment to my head. I’m craving the sweet harmony of your voice quiver as you try and ask me why. I want to see you suffer, even if its just for a moment.

You see after the terrible relationship we've had you deserve it. You deserve to suffer at least a fraction of the pain you’ve caused me. Endless games and you always come out on top. I'm tired of being the victim. I'm tired of being the frail figure thrown to the side as you engulf every moment of your victory. No empathy or remorse. Worst of all, no love.

To be honest, I can’t blame you entirely. I should have seen the signs. Constantly needing all eyes fixed on you. Parading me around like I was merely a prize meant to be put on display. Telling me that I'd be nothing without you. Telling me that I’m lucky I got to love a man like you. You’re probably wondering why I even stayed for so long? Well, I let your sour words pour into my empty belly because at least it was being filled. Trust me, when you're starving taste isn’t your main concern. Especially when the bitter words are falling off of such a sweet tongue.

Our relationship felt more like we were in a constant war rather than in an endless love. But it was a war I never wanted to end. Continuous battles and betrayals. Deceiving, lies, trickery. However the feeling that we had each other was always there. That even if it was hate, misery, and pain we were in it together. Sometimes it felt like we were actually on the same side. And even when we were fighting against each other it was a war that both parties were present in. I’d rather face the utter despair of war than the grieving emptiness of being alone. In my mind cries of agony were better than silence. So a battlefield was where I resided for the past year.

That’s why after everything you’ve put me through its my turn. Its my turn to inflict the same kind of hurt onto you. But I was going to do it right. I was carefully crafting my plan to attack. We were going to have a perfect night. A beautiful warm meal melting your taste buds, hand made by yours truly just as you like it. I’d feed you delicate lies on how perfect you are and how lucky I am. After dinner we’d take a moonlit walk as we hold hands and make plans for the future. Then when I feel I have you. When I finally feel like you’re completely entranced by my spell of counterfeit love I’ll do it. I’ll finally say…

“Lani, did you hear me? I said we’re over.”

I snapped out of my gaze. My palms sweating a pool of pain, my head throbbing overtime to make up for the stiffness of my heart, my body gone numb. My mind starts scrambling into a mess of emotions. Are you really leaving me? After everything I put up with and you’re the one leaving me? But I can’t do this without you. I need you. We need each other. Suddenly silence fell over the war-torn connection between us like dew on fresh morning grass. Cold and harsh but somewhat peaceful. I-

“I heard.” Was the only thing I managed to slip out of my burning throat.

Guns down. Flags raised. The final battle and of course, you won.